Who is she?
I once was asked
Unaware of the question being asked
I stood confused, searching their view
While asking who?or whom?
Who is she? they repeat.
She who I ask.
Not understanding the she of the speech
The girl who has you smiling insane
The girl who has you blushing
Tell me her name
I just simply smile and say
She is my everything
I spent this last year looking for something
And I am glad to say I found it
I found it in my sons laugh
I found it in my daughters smile
I found it in the way my son says da
I found it in the way my son got excited to see me
I also found it in Mrs. K
My life is a mess trust me
But these small finds mean the world to me
We all have a path called life
We choose when to turn left or right
We all decided who we walk beside
Please just choose wise
Because the people you walk beside
May disappear and fade from your life
I'm dressed for the occasion
I'm ready for this odd meditation
Where I take your hate and use it as motivation
I take your labels and use them to help me reach my destination
I call this my hated conversation
As I go though the negative things you keep saying
The dark cloud that follows me around
The mess I bring to every situation
I just smile and say I still will win in the end
I dont need your congratulations
All I need is my twisted meditation
Where your hate becomes simply
He used his comics as his voice.
They said what needed to be said.
They acted out what he couldn't no doubt.
I just wish I could do the same.
Cause I don't know how to say what I need to say.
I know I can rhyme in a strange way,
But what I have to say will cause pain.
So the question remains,
How do i say what I need to say?
How do I allow my words to form a weapon in my face.
My word becoming bulits of pain.
When my only wish they could save the day.
I guess the first step I have to take
Is to open my mouth and begin to speak.
I take it my life is a game to you,
That explains the things you do.
Cause one plus one is still two.
Oh I forgot I look like a fool to you.
That's why you post what you do.
That's why your social site never said anything of us two?
To be specific it says your single 🤔
Well isn't that true?
But here you post pictures of us two
Well why would you?
Cause game is your middle name and it's all you do.
Well game over, you lose.
I realized today ...
A lie is just like a cigarette.
It doesn't take a big extreme spark to get started.
It doesn't take a big extreme lie to cause pain.
And then it starts to burn away, sometimes at an alarming rate.
Even the little ones hurt and cause pain.
Always ending at the butt.
Always ending with someone feeling like they got kicked in the butt.
There is no such thing as a little white lie or a healthy cigarette don't ask me why.
Lies have no color, nor can they pick sides, cigarettes don't care if they take your life.
No one even cares for the reason why.
They just wish you didn't lie or smoke cause they want you in their life.
Yet for some reason people do them all...
You ever just sit and wonder?
Wonder... about what your life will be
Wonder... about how your night will be
Wonder is such a deadly thing.
Because wonder steals your reality.
Leaving you missing out on what's happening.
Sitting there thinking what if and maybe
And never enjoy where you're standing.
Cause what you dont enjoy lately
You will be Regretting.
Allow me a moment of your time
To tell you what I did in time
I went back to a period when blacks was hated you see
Hated in America to be specific excuse me
A time when they were called monkeys
and hung from trees
A time when you could get lynched legally
A time when freedom ment a different thing
A time when a crazy man with a dream
Decide to stand up and speak
Speak about justice and peace
Speak about freedom and liberty
Now I guess there is something you should know about me
No I wouldn't want to be Doctor Martin Luther king
I would just like to be...
A random black male listening to his speech
A random black male who name escapes me
A random black ...
What should I write?
Should I write about my pain?
About how my heart has been broken,
How people call me out my name,
How I wish I could end it all,
How I wanted a bullet to the brain.
Maybe that's too dark, too cold.
Maybe... let's move on.
How about my 4 reasons to live.
I should write about my 4 beautiful kids.
Their happiness is all I wish.
I could write about anything...
What I got it!
I will write about this...
Oh my look at the time!
It's been a while since I wrote in rhyme,
Hopefully I haven't forgot.
How the pen keeps time.
How each ink drop, is a new drop of life.
How each line can fade out of sight.
How a word can change my readers mind.
How a phrase can stop time.
I hope I remember how to write in rhyme.
Because this time, my words will fly.
Fly above my pain, my hurt, my shame.
Fly above it all, with no refrain.
My words will hold the key, to my freedom of speach.
You really don't have to like me,
or read what my ink helps breathe.
You just need to sit back, relax and let the ink breathe.
There is life in these words any fool can see.
So please be careful not to kill my free...
Blue skies and grey skies
How do I exspress this pain in side.
I been played like a game,
I guess I should change my name.
Just call me monopoly,
Or a fool they both are fitting.
I mean truly who was I kidding,
Thinking I meant anything to her.
I was stupidly in love.
I hung on her every word.
Only to turn my back,
And feel the blade of her sword.
It was colder than ice, stiff like a bord.
Sorry the wound is still sore.
Why don't they sale mended hearts at the grocery store?
What are you looking for?
That's the question I ask.
Because this planet is huge in mass.
So what are you looking for?
Have you even started your search?
Because remember there are billion people on earth.
Are you looking for love?
Or some felling ya know.
That feeling that she or he is perfect for me.
Or maybe you are looking for a great body
I don't know what you seek
I just know one thing
Don't base your choice on feelings
Feelings change in a blink
Feelings grow and sink
Feeling are like seasons never the way they suppose to be
So search Earth wisely
Because what you searching for could be right behind you
Take a glance at this back ground.
See the cars on the ground?
Ok one more question now.
Which ones are going forward?
Did you figure it out?
Or do you have doubts?
It's simple allow me to help you out.
Forward doesn't mean you have no doubts.
Forward doesn't mean you figured it out.
Forward just mean.....
Your past will NEVER HOLD YOU DOWN
Who is moving forward now?
Watch the pen
See how it glides?
How these scribbles come to life?
How this pen changed my life?
Can you see it?
Or are you blind?
Are you unable to understand?
Struggling to comprehend?
Shhhhhh just watch the pen
Let it write
It knows what's inside
Who cares if it's spelled right?
Just shut up and let the pen write
Let the pen dance with the paper tonight
And tomorrow you can go back to once again
Hiding your feelings inside and throw away the pen
Who are you to say who I am?
Who are you?
How do you know who I am?
How can you sit there and say
"I know him better than he knows himself"
When all you know is what someone else wrote
You don't know me
My likes and disbeliefs
You don't know me
My reasons for joy and peace
You don't know me
So once again
Who are you
To say who I am
Excuse me come again
Oh your the voice in my head
I wish I was an artist
I would paint my pain
I wish I was an artist
I would show you why I'm being driven insane
I wish I was an artist
I would illustrate some of the things they say
I wish I was an artist
However I'm stuck with word play
So when I say how I feel it's not meant to make you feel a certain way
See how I feel is how I feel
What I feel can be fake and real
My words may build a bridge called relate
However my words are still mine so please take them off your plate
My words may offend you
Then turn the page, stop reading and just look away
I don't write to make you happy
I don't write to make you smile
I write because I have to put these words down...
I don't get it
I don't understand
Why do so many people hold gavels in their hands
Who appointed you?
Who said you can judge me?
Oh you don't need my approval?
Then I'm not listening to you
I didn't ask for your two cents
Please keep your nonsense
I honestly don't have time for this
Oh you have a theory
Well good but your not hearing
Your judgement doesn't affect me
So go run along
Be along your mary way
And go judge some fool
Who will listen to what you say
Dear sir/or Madam
I am sorry to inform you, but you are to late. Your child is 18 and you have missed everything .
Yes the first laugh, first smile, first words, and the first fall downs. You miss the good times, the bad times, and yes the nursery rhymes.
You missed so much please share with us what occupied your time. Was it your job? Attempting to get ahead on the road of life. Was it your significant other? Making sure you wouldn't live alone in life.
Was it your hobbies? Yes I know the car, boat and RV show is only once a year.
Well now you have time to be here. Time to share, time to spare, to bad father time doesn't care. To bad so sad, there is no go...
The crowd shouted
The man was paralyzed by fear
Yet his face was dry & free of tears
What's going on here
Could this all be because of me
I being to blench
Praying I don't have to see this
As my father quiet the crowd
As if he was the Pope
As if he wore a royal crown
I blench as his cold Icy hand touches me
We must lynch this boy my father screams
And in that moment I seen something
Back of the crowd a group of white teens
No older then me
With their heads hung down in shame
If only I could tell them that I agree
That lynching this color boy
Just for looking at me is the wrong thing
But with crowd focused on me
Have you every had a night.....
A night that changed your life
A night so simple & so right
You rub your eyes to ensure it's life
A night so joyful
You begin to sing
A night so sweet
You sigh a peaceful relief
A night so perfect
You hope morning never comes
Well this isn't that type of night
Someone click the switch
Bring on the daylight
Because if this night doesn't end
I'm afraid I will fall again
What makes her beautiful?
What you can't see?
No it's not her hips or body
Though I want her on me
No not her smile
Though it drives me wild
No not her kiss
Though I love her lips
No not her touch
It so much more....
But I can't say
Cause if you don't see her beauty
Then you should just walk away
I sit here unable to sleep
Unable to think
Unable to breathe
Unable to speak
Simply because she messaged me
That split moment reminded me
Our first kiss
Her beautiful eyes
The good times
Then I got slapped with reality
When the message had nothing
Nothing to do with me
But now I sit
Wishing I could change one thing
Simply the fact that I still breath
Because the pain of knowing I lost...
I gave up....
I screwed up.....
I foolishly walked away....
She won't be in my arms today....
Kill me please because missing you
Hurts more then my kids growing up
End this pain.....
Wait let me live.....
This pain doesn't c...
Love is more than missing her body
Love is missing her and her hobbies
Love is more than sex at night
Love is getting lost in her eyes
Love is sitting watching a sunrise
Love is more than a product called KY
Love is more than her moaning at night
Love is not sex it's time to get it right
Love is crying...
Because she is not by your side
Love doesn't believe that men don't cry
Love is not what's between her thighs
Love is more than sex a million times
So don't say you love me with your body
Say love me with your heart, mind, soul and body.
Excuse me while I prepare
I hear I got a fight out there
Not sure whom
Not sure where
Just sure I can't be scared
I must conquer this fear
Someone tell my opponent beware
There will be no tie to share
Just me not quitting
Till they declare
I won the fifth fair and square
Why must I repeat myself
Can't you hear me?
Or your to worried about yourself
So I have to repeat myself
Listening is truly a skill
And you know what skill rhymes with
You guessed it kill
So if you don't have a skill
Does that mean you should be killed?
Hey I'm sorry just keeping it real
I shouldn't have to repeat
If you love me
When I speak...
You should be paying attention
If I'm as important as you claim
And if you love me like you say
But no I'm force to repeat things
I guess I should say this again
Cause I'm sure you didn't understand
I'm not very Apathetic
Tho when people cry I have dry eye
I feel emotions... Well some times?
I swear I cry
Wait no... I just had something in my eye
But I get excited at times
See that proves I'm not Apathetic
Oh wait no... that was a dream about me
Crap what does this mean
Am I a soulless, careless, emotionless
Apathetic human being
Why shout at one and other to be mean
Why do people do these thing
Then turn around and say they love me
Why shut down
Why refuse to speak
When communication is the key
To solving problems and things
Maybe I'm just strange
Thinking that talking though things
Well is the best thing
Maybe I should yell
Maybe I should scream
Maybe I should cut you off
In the middle of your speech
Or maybe just maybe
I should talk about things
And listen to what you have to say
And wait to respond but anyway
Love shouldn't shout
Love shouldn't scream
Love is kind and definitely not mean
Love waits it turn
Doesn't interrupt your words
Love is ama...
Shhh can't you see my stress
Can't you see this mess
No I'm not saying you caused this
I'm just enjoying the rest
The peace before hell swallows me
But of course I'm over reacting
The truth is you couldn't be me
You couldn't survive my life
That's why we're different
Like day and night
No I'm not saying your life is nice
I'm just saying mine is mine
So if I feel overwhelmed
Just let me be
Because if I snap
You won't recognize me