|A Man Of God, A True Prodigal Son, Former Opiate Addict & Perfectly flawed Photographer Kakinomoto No Hitomaro|
Tonites Thought On Abortion & Adoption Along with regret, hope, hopelessness, healing & and the heart.
Many beautiful children who will grow to contribute wonderful things to the world will have their chance at life and to breathe the air we all breathe.
Always remember that adoption is one of the greatest gifts for ones heart and soul without the guilt and shame of knowing one has murdered their own child as time passes, age takes its place along with cares and regrets you could never know until time decides you're ready to know what true cares and regrets are when you truly understand and appreciate how fast time has flown by.
Giving a life to a family who cannot create on their own wil...
"Having an intense fear of just one thing will debilitate every aspect of ones life & eliminate the confidence one longs for."
I wander the forsaken empty streets of this beautiful place
Remembering you forgetting me.
How can my dreams of you be so much more real than you ever were?
I long for your touch & I dream of the love you could only give if I were asleep.
Do you dream of me?
Perhaps in time we will meet once again, perhaps I will dream that you dreamt about me.
Photography by Ali Koushan
"Spending time with the poor and lowly in spirit will enrich one more than one could think."
The Character Of The Weary
"At times the grief that I am responsible for instilling into those most dearest to me seems as though it can only be forgiven by their pity at my own death."
"If we are not loving the way God describes love within the pages of His living Word then we are loving a lie."
May 11, 1944
"I must work, so as to not be a fool, to get on, to become a journalist, because that's what I want! I know that I can write , a couple of my stories are good, my descriptions of the "Secret Annexe" are humourous, theres alot in my diary that speaks, but- whether I have real talent remains to be seen, I can shake off everything if I write; my sorrows disappear, my courage is reborn. But, and that is the great question, will I ever be able to write anything great."
The Truth Pt.3
You absolutely cannot allow your own untrustworthy feelings to dictate your walk with God. The devil will have an absolute field day with your life if you allow it & you will know what real loneliness, heaviness, guilt, shame and condemnation are truly like.
I myself underestimated this very thing and 20 years of my life was nothing but a feeling of self desolation rooted in self reliance which led to many wasted years in sadness and heaviness filled with regret.
We must turn over the "I cans" to "Lord, I need you to".
(A recurring vivid dream, who is she?)
I will never forget your long black hair being caressed by golden brown light as you stood in the archway of the ancient Roman ruins.
The twenty years of pain, sufferings, numbness and loss all began with the sweet scent of helping a friend in need.
Can I live with myself with what I have left behind?
Perhaps if I could remember.
The sickening nauseatingly complexity of memory has its hands around my throat each day God gifts me.
And still I fight, giving up is never an option.
I serve a God who will break me, only through brokenness can I be set free and God do I welcome you in to shatter and rebuild my soul.
Come quickly, I'm so tired.
She vanished as soon as she opened the book. As if she got sucked into the pages. The story that was once just a story in a book, was now her life....
The pages seemed to write themselves as I stared deeply distressed wondering if she may be staring back at me wherever she is..
I remember her, I remember her profile in the rain filled morning standing on the streets of the coast as she looked out to the song of romance sung by the mighty waves of the Atlantic.
I saw her.
I remember, I remember her soft skin when I would place my hand upon her chest and upon her heart when I needed to calm the desperation of mine own hearts despair.
With her I was still alone.
I remember, I remember the ...
THE TRUTH PT.2
The key to beginning a real relationship with the Lord comes with nothing less than pure honesty about everything, even though God already knows he wants you to express every honest deep emotion you have because he wants you to learn to trust him & avoid the damage as well as the danger that lies within the confusion and of feelings .
Why is prayer the absolute hardest thing so many of us struggle with?
Because the Flesh and the devil know it is the absolute most powerful weapon a Christian has that evil must attempt to stop us from utilizing. We are called soldiers in the New Testament and prayer is literally our number 1 most destructive (WMD) or weapon of mass destruction...
Never forget you are also a son and you are also a daughter.
You are royalty in an unimaginable realm of incomprehensible beauty and beauty beyond all human comprehension that you will one day walk with the Lord in all his majesty and golden brown glory surrounding you, embracing you in the warmth of his spirit as you are shrouded in the Finest white linen that only can be found in the city of Gold, made by the heavenly hosts specifically tailored to you and made just for you as the Lord your Father who loves you so much. Even when you, like I myself cannot process how to love or act as though we do take comfort in knowing that God sees your heart and he knows every concern you ha...
Frightening power resides in the words we speak.
As Christ tells us in the bible - "the power of the tongue holds life and death."
It is a weapon of mass destruction or a tool to build and repair.
Impermanence has become permanent, I long to know how to love, even mine own self.
One of life's greatest gifts is knowing we will have wonderous cares to grow into as we age and fade to share with wise youths who truly listen.
In every relationship I believe & have learned there is always one person who loves more & who loves deeper.
There is always one who refuses to forget and there is always one who's heartstrings resonate with the memories.
There is always one who never let's old love die forgotten until both are the dust they were created.
There is always one who takes the memory of love into the heavenly courts of Zion whilst the other is lost in darkness alone within the absence of time.
Does love truly ever die?
I think not.
The beast of numbness lies dormant deep within.
All I want is to kill it as I bleed it out of my eyes and down my face.
Pastors beheaded, pastors gutted alive in a Turkish hotel room by enemies posed as those who were truly interested in coming to know Christ, persecuted brothers with courage beyond all comprehension bleeding out in agony.
Blood of war crying into the ears of our Lord Christ.
My life, although chosen by God seems so insignificant at times because I dont face the same grave threats as my fallen brothers in the Lord here in the west.
Is it wrong for me to desire living in the same dangers?
The ultimate test of faith.
Let your love embrace me and make me its prisoner. Oh my God, so that I may know it.
Trying to make sense of my emotions after years of masking them in the resin of a flower is as cold as a billboard on the highway in bold black letters that screams confusion.
Hope, even when it all seems lost always remains a loyal friend that you love to hate.
Alluring almond eye's
Long Persian hair
In the garden she walks
Into her eye's I stare.
Blue into brown
Her eye's are
Shaded by limbs of lashes
Bearing the reflection of the stars
I would much rather your eyes tell me how much you love me than have your lips deceive us both.
Eyes wide open
Beholding the evil capacity of darkness within mankind
The darkness abounds where the light is absent
The event horizon draws near
The voice of an archangel all will hear
Power and peace
Laughter and love
Death draws nigh, for the darkness shall die
As the the light rises in the east
Enthroned within the absence of time
His glory, His eyes.
Within the rain every tear I shed has a different story to tell, yet noone is able to hear their voice within this storm as they're washed away.