Soms moeten we keuzes maken
Hoe moeilijk dat ook is.
Keuzes omdat je van jezelf houdt
Keuzes omdat dat jou keuze is om jezelf te kunnen zijn.
Soms doen we een ander daarbij pijn
En willen we die keuze niet maken.
Maar het gaat om jou
Om jou zelfliefde....Om te zijn wie jij bent
Om verder te groeien en jouw pad te volgen.
Ook is het vaak wat anderen denken een drempel om het niet te doen
Maar jij leeft voor jezelf....niet voor een ander.
Als jij achter jouw gevoel staat en dat volgt ga je stralen.....groeien en bloeien.
Laat je niet beperken door een ander
Ieder heeft zijn eigen verantwoordelijkheid
De liefde in jezelf voel je als jij ben wie jij bent
En daar gaat het om...
Inked on paper
Inked on my body
I'am addicted to Both
Both it is a way to Express yourself,
I love to wright the words of feelings and emoties in paper.
But i love to skets those emoties in a drawing that become a tattoo with a story on my body
All my tattoo's are mine hidden under neith my clothes,
The have a special meaning formele not to show to others
Just as my deepest darkest saddest happiest feeling are on paper just here
Yesterday draw a new tattoo design
Can't wait for the moment the tattoo pen gonne set his pen on my skin
another part of my story on my body
Just like another part of my story written here
I love my inkted life
And there i go again.
Making the mistake agian
when wil i learn
Trusting to soon to much iam to stupid to see,
believing the words that were spoken to me.
I'am afraid i will never learn
I always feel like this
Just feeling down and sad angry at myself voor nog are the things as the are.
Who the are
Its killing me when or who's gonne be real with me for one time
My trust is totally gone...
Ooh its Hurt do much
I wish someone have true intentions Just for once
I'am a Dreamer believe in the good in love in in being real onesty and trust .....
Maybe u need the stop dreaming because that's got me in this shit
I learnt a new things about me today.
Even do i always dat to met babygirl.
When you do something die another you must do that from the heart with the right intension.
And not because you want something in return
You can't expect from others that what you gife to others
they once return you the favor.
I loved to help Care en being there for others, without they have to be there for me.
But lately i wonders when wil somebody Care for me not because the want something for me just for me
why i'am Hurting and feel not enaugh
Why why why
Je doet niks fout
Je hebt niks fout gedaan
Het is niet jouw schuld
Dat je je zo voelt
Dat je leven is zoals het nu is
Dat het telkens weer zo loopt
Dat je (even) niet weet hoe anders
Dat je (soms) vastloopt
Het is het leven dat zich iets aan jou laat zien
Het is het leven dat je uitnodigt om te kijken
Dat je uitnodigt om toe te laten
En als je toelaat wordt het helder
Dat het enkel dit was dat zich liet zien
Dat het je iets wilde zeggen
En niet meer, niet minder dan dat
Dat je niks fout deed
Maar dat er gewoon nog iets zat
Iets wat je tot nu toe moeilijk vond om naar te kijken
En nu misschien wel lukt
En als het niet lukt is dat precies wat moet zijn
Is dat precies wat je mag ervaren
I'am blessed to still have my father around,
As little girl you always want to Marry your dad,
My dad was always there where i needed him.
Hè thought me so many great things in life about life.
My babygirl when she was born my father was there with me
Helpt me true sicaxan
was with me the moment i became a mother and my dad for the first time a grandad.
Hè helpt me raise my little girl seeing hem enjoying being a grandad.
Spend time with my baby
Is priceless, hè showed and teach here do many great things in life about life
I'am grateful for my dad in so many ways.
I love him for who hè is what hè thought me and my babygirl.
Happy fathersday i love you
Such a small word
But such a impact
I don't trust easily
Don't make me promisses Just to keep me for your entertainment.
I am a big girl
Better the truth then a lie.
Better alone then being played.
If i give you my trust,
and you play with that's i'am out no goodbye no last words i Just dissepear
If you ask why let me tell you.
Even how much i like love Care for you
i Care for myself also.
If you don't show me i wil not show you
simpel learned that lessons a long ago.
Trust is easy given
but once broken hard to repair
We were drunk all night of love and dreaming
Counting stars all night, and I remember well
How you told me your name and ask me and ask me mine
But after a few days talking
Nothing came.. and i knew
At the moment you were gone
There are clouds across the sun
All my life I've waited for you
Sky came tumbling down
From the moment you were gone
All my life been die to meet you
But ever since you're gone
There are clouds across the sun
Be free to be who you are
Accept was had been in your life before.
Dont be affraid of what the future will be.
Dont live your life in the past our your future
Live your life in the present en enjoy it.
You onley have today yesterday is gone
and Tomorrow ....
Well mayby there is no tommorow.
Just be who you are
be free to do whatever you want
be bold to try new things
Life today as it is your last day
I need the need to have some qouit time..
I need the need to feel again..
I need the need to breathe again...
I need the need to relax again..
I need the need to love and be loved again
I need the need to trust it al works out...
Al those needs i need to get going on.
Instead of needing it i'am gonne truts it.
No more needs for me to need...
It only brings me dissepointment ...
Let go of my needs and follow whats come.
Live without needing is my new goal
This week everybody's gonne heard if the getting their diploma.
Babygirl you also supossed the het this news.
Except the last years were hard
And even harder tot you.
In steed of learning at school you learn to survice
In steed you being with tour Friends
You learned to defend yourself
You learned do many hard lessons
You niet so much school because of that.
You start another school after Summers break you dind't het tour diploma in this school
Bit baby you deserve a golden plaquette voor al you been true.
You gonne make IT i'am so proud of you
With only you in my thoughts
Drifting on dreams we share.
Knowing we never have the futures together
We only have what we share in this moment
Both want more both feeling connect
but were miles and decinia apart from each other
But yet so close in my heart,
One soul who have touch me in so many ways,
wil never ever be truly mine.
But in dreams we are together
Feeling love and to be loved.
A love do far away
and deels so close
It Burns me inside and has awakening a part of me that no longer existend,
You are my babe my light my dreams and my hopes
You made me feel a lot
So thank you for coming in my life even you are far away.
You always have me your dreams
I i have you in mines
I'am drowning in my own thoughts
i'am silence, but i want to scream
I want to run, but i can't move
I want to be happy, no longer sad.
I want to embrace it instead i fear it
Dont want to lose it again, but its Hurt to dammm much
I want to forget it instead te relife it
Please let me swim far away from it.
Dont let me drown another time.
I know rha darkness is Lurking
To take me under
I am tempted to sink down under
I'am tired of fighting
the same battle over and over again.
But i must bit give in or up
I gonne swim no matter what
I won't let me pull under even if its my last battle i have to fight
Swim to the light even if the darkness is temped to surrender to.
Whats matter is ...
Not who was with you at the
Beginning the ....
Its who wil be there with you in
the end ...
That's whats matter most
And suddely she felt a tear escape
One by one the tears keep falling down
She could't stop them even if she wanted it
she doesn't inderstandt why she cried.
But after a while the tears slowly stopt.
Here face al wet from tears spillend
Here eyes are red and swollen.
But here heart felt lighten a bit.
She could't breathe again a little
Sometimes a good cry doesn't need to be understand, you
Just let it happend,
so that you heal a little bit, breathe a little bit,
Because tears are there for when you can't sprak because its hurts to much.
Lets the tears flow so the pain and hurt can wash away and make room for Happinez and Joy.
Once in a while a good cry can set you free.
The heart wants what its wants.
But that doesn't mean,
it gets what it wants
The universum gives you what you need
And nog whats you wants.
You are here to learn,
To find your Destiny
To follow your own journey
So even if you want sometimes in life and you won't be getting it
Remember it was not meant for you then.
There are other things people who you will meet, some you met for a reason let go and move on
The all have a rol in your life
But you have the biggest part,
Don't dwel on the whats if how of coulds.
Focus on the what Comes....
Enjoy Every bit Every moment envery time
In the end IT all works out
For those who don't understand why i'am the way i'am
That i live to Wright down my feelings
Because of the pain,grief the hurt the emoties sadness
The moments of Joy Happinez love.
I all wrote it down,
being in nature calms bring me back to myself
So i tell you this..
Read my letters, the Breese murmwerd
Listen to me, the Willow whispers
Heal within , the forest begged
My letters for the ones i love
Dit those who want to know me
A letter from me who i'am were are and become
Just a reminder...
A romance van be killed,
But love....... it can't.
Love lives on
And i'am patient enaugh,
To wait for my happily ever after
Part 2 # the good girl
Always being the good brave girl,
The simple girl who lived next door
The one who was always quiet inviseble and shy.
Always been seen as the girl who was everybody's friend, who was there to help you talkt with you being there for those who needed me.
Never the hot sexy girl who you wanted to kiss hugg and wanted to show to your Friends.
Who took a risk and be bold free and
I've been that girl for so long
Even when i was married i still was the good girl pleases those i loved
Now its time to start Pleasing myself finding out who is am when i stop being the girl next door but becoming the woman Deep within me who wanted te feel Passion lust love crazy sexting
Just to connect with you,
Its beyond i ever could imaged.
You have captered me
right from the first moment
Yet so far apart but so close to my heart.
Buttterflies flying around.
In a world so far apart living different lives and lifestyle
we found each other we connected true words feelings emoties..
Both have been broken before
Words were spoken before to another.
But Just you and i we are connected by oure words dreams emoties state of mind
2 people reconize so much in each other
We are connected isnt it amazing words can connect people but tear people also away choose your words wisely once said if van never taken back.
I'am glad true our words we connected
Even world aparts ages a...
Part 1# knowing & feeling
Discover your passion
Discover your needs and wants
Discover who you are
Discover what you like and don't like
Discover your wild side
Discover your sexy side
Never be ashamed of yourself to discover who you are and likes.
We were brought up in a world were we have learned from a young age how to behave.
So if you are confuse about who you are.
Your heart and head don't matches
Be brave don't stay in your comfortzone.
Just because you been raised different.
Doesn't mean you can't discover your wild side your sexy side
That's not making you bad of wrong
Its Just a part yet to discover who you are,
Just another path your journey
Discover what you desire what makes...
And once again.
Lying in the dark with no sleep to come soon
Sharing my mind ideas and my tears with the moon & stars
The moon know the real me
As the night sets i feel what the moon trying to tell me
What i need to do what to let go
Feeling it in my hole body when the Moon starts a new fase.
I love the Moon as much as i love the sun.
But only the Moon knows the real me let me feel and think
The sun gives me a blanket of warm love and affaction
The Moon let me think about love and affaction
I need Both in my life the light and the dark.
Even so i love the light for what it is its Bright hopefull loving and warm
The dark is a place i know to well
Been in the dark way too long
Pain hurt dis...
I love to put words that are in my head on paper...
Love to express how i feel
or share on paper what keeping me up and busy,
When i start to wright words come easy to me.
Always knowing what to wright
To put my thoughts feelings my wishes and Desires on paper
I let my guards down and only by writing i let my my deepest feelings come alive only then i'am not afraid of the words i speak
Every word is fully me i'am what i writing without being scared of hurting people because i always were different .
But by putting my words my needs my desire on paper i can be myself and In a way it sets me free
Freeing my mind my heart with all those thoughts of mine
Dealing with pain caring love strug...
Always act and react on situation people and things in life
how hard of painfull they can be
Act everytime with the right intension with the feeling love
Only love never on hate.
Because in the end love leads you to the light
And hate leaves you in the dark
Love is the one that works also healing for you.
Hates works negative and keep you down and in the dark
So by choosing to handle with love you can handle everything
And you can set yourself free.
When you been hurt
Its easy to hate someone and to stay in it.
but its a harder to handlle it with love when you are hurt
But in the end is it love what makes who hole and hate makes you empty
I Will always choose the love over the ha...
Part three # loving
After some experiance in love
After i divorced my high school love
I dind't ever want to fall in love again
Because that love destroit me complety
I knew love as i have to fight for it.
Giving all the love of me to people
Is normal for me 100%
But never ever getting the same love in return
I never wanted to give my heart again, only to be broken again
When i love you i love deeply
I move mountains for those i love.
Can someone please wants to move mountains for me?
Learning to trust men is hard for me.
Up until now the have lied cheat and played me, Sweet talkt me, all in the name of love. I trust to easily that's my fault.
I know its not easy to love me
Part two # loving
Being single engage married divorced window
We al want that loving feeling.
Maybe not at some times but when times past loving and to be loved is a feeling we all need or want.
I've seen a view kind of love of my own
been in a high school love for so long got dirvoced
met a one night
A love who burnt the Both of us
but yet stayed unanwer (bummer)
A copy of the wrong love i divorced (lessons learned)
A love only for the lust
A love with a player
I stil think i'am a fool in love.
Why i hear you think..
Because i'am a true romatic person
I still believe in the one true love
Believe in soulmates & twinflame
Believe love and then i meen true that love wil concur it all...
Part one # loving
The journey of love comes in different forms and stages in your life
first Cruz your childhood love, unanwers love,
Thinking hè is the one love,
even a ons night stand love caunts.
Al those feelings ..
Love lust Desire compassion crying feelings Joy buttterflies Heartbeat
Love is beautiful and painfull risky and the best feeling ever of worst
love can make you feel high and low.
You can be with one person your whole life or not.
You should not be judge of the way you love or not.
You must do whats fits you right not what others think is right for you
Love the way you want wat you need
Never be afraid to open up for love
Even if love broke you at one poin...
I Just trust and believe in the story of my journey my path in my life.
I believe in alle kinda things in life.
I don't Understand why life can be hard some times, but that is oké for not knowing it OR qoutions it no longer
I know true the hard times we all going true from time to time.
There are some of the biggest and most
Precious life lessons to be learned in those hard times
I made some mistakes and i wil make some more down the journey without a doubt.
But i'am feeling so sad, because life standing still for me,
I know it is not true but its feels like it.
I Wanne start living and make my dreams come true.
I don't need that's much,
a job i love doing work that i love that's pay's ...
And suddely she felt here eyes drift away...
Slowly closing here eyes.
She was feeling al the tiredness alle the feeling of
not feeling save always having here guards up 24/7 slowly driftig away.
Why because now she can breathe
Inhale and exhale
for knowing that she and het baby girl are safe and go wereever she and haar precious one wanted to go and finnely can sleep with Both eyes closed
Feeling blessed even it is dit a little while.
Knowing you can life live without fear.
You can walk outside knowing hè won't get to you
Breathe without holding your breathe
And sleep with closed eyes because your safe.
i long for the good old days when we c do all things without thinking about IT.
Today its your birtday ....
And i thought of wishing you a really awesome birthday because of old Times we shared.
But then i remember the pain you coat me the Hurt you put me true
Or better i put myself true it.
You broke My trust and faithr in you. Shared intimied moments beteeen is with others Just to make you deel better Ir good about yourself
The old me would have sending you a birtday tekst Just because that's who i was once.
The new me wil not sending you a tekst no ballroom no nothing
Why because of hoe you react with tour behavior
Finnely you are a year onder i hope you can behalve like a man and not a boy with this nee agenda of yours
That's nu wish because last year you werd a Di...