||Capricious|Fanciful|Juke box|Solicitous|in short, I sing till the wind would stop hearing to my voice. An Icecream & the beach cud make my world|
The only sound that I could hear was that of my breath gushing in and out of me, like I was underwater.
Like when the water is flooding my ears, I couldn’t hear any sound, and he couldn’t hear me saying no.
I was torn, but the wall I built was still unscathed.
It kept me from screaming or crying.
The bricks were patient,
it was towering over me until he was gone.
It was over.
I would never be the same.
It told me that now there was a door that can open.
They said you let it happen once and it never stops.
I wish I’d known, but it was too late.
The foundation too strong by bricks and stones layered on top of each other building me up as I grew older.
It didn’t let me yell and fi...
It’s an other night again and she’s against the clock, to lock her thoughts and throw em’ away in the nooks and corners of her wits.
After the unsuccessful strive to turn off her think island and enter in to the merry go round land of nightmares.
She thought, which one of them is better?
The island filled with sinking hopes, respiring despair and exerting exhilaration , or those nightmares filled with jitters, fulminations and heinous every night.
May be I’d rather say, there’s always little bit of both.
Thoughts never end, and far out those eye lids fall.
I know you've been busy.
I understand." She said
But there were a million thoughts that kept running inside her mind.
She never felt like this about anyone, she started to trust him even after all the times she's been cheated on by other men.
She never wanted to judge this person, with everyone else just because she had few bad ordeals.
"All of them aren't gonna be the same", She thought.
Last time an ex of her's didn't call her up for a week, and later his girlfriend answers his phone to just let her know, that he's been cheating on that Girl with her. (Coz the Girlfriend is the one who has been with him for more than a year. And she's been just for about three months)
She wonders ...
Ever felt that you are fighting a battle with your own self.
The Old Evil Self.
There's some other person who you were in the past still stuck inside you, making you feel guilty, pulling you back from what you have become.
If there was a way, I wish I could just pull this person out from my inside.. And kill it forever.
But, They always say that you have a baggage to travel for life, I wish I could just unpack, and remove everything that belongs to my past.
I'm scared that, what if someone just find something from those scattered things and bring it back to my future, what would I do? How would I get rid of it?
Yes I don't believe you,
I don't believe that being Benevolent like Cinderella, would make her win her charming prince,..
I don't believe that waiting for years together in sleep with the zeal had brought Sleeping Beauty her prince,..
I don't believe that Snow White didn't swallow the hatred, but waited unconsciously for the Prince to kiss her back to life,...
I don't believe that a Beauty so serene, could find love in a beast so wild,.
I don't believe that a Princess could entrust a frog to become the Prince of her life.
I don't believe that Golden Locks of hair have given the hope for Rapunzel to await for her Prince that frees her from her misery,..
I don't believe that...
I asked her, why are you crying dear?
She looked at me and smiled.
It was a very pleasant yet, a heart wrenching smile that captured me. I wanted to know what she's been going through, to know how could she smile through those tears falling down her cheek, I couldn't help but ask her more and more. She knew, her eyes told me the stories that I wanted to hear, so she didn't hide it anymore, and she spoke in silence.
"Most of you think I'm cold. I've been with too many guys. I'm the best at breaking hearts. I just change men quick than I change clothes. For me it's just a Doll house play. Everyone is judged.
But you know what, no one knows that my heart breaks too. That, I've tried , I've lo...
Did we change it? Or Was it like this all the time?
Soul Mate, Once In a Life time, Love at first sight, Imprints on to your Heart.
Do these things sound familiar? Or does it all feel like a bunch of lies?
Was that All Not Knowing? Or Is it now Ignoring?
Its a Conundrum where you never know what is right and what is wrong.
It always is tricky to make the choice, take a decision.
They say that there are two things inside you,
Your Heart And Your Mind, both think differently.
But, are there really two things inside you?
If there are, then why do they say you're half a soul, and there's another part of you that's waiting to join.
If so, then why do they break apart...
She : Hello!
He : Hey! What's up with you these days? So, many sad status updates. You don't reply to my texts, you keep ignoring me.
She : (Thinks, from when is he concerned about her) Nothing as sorts. You tell me, what's Going on?
He : It's been quite a while, we haven't met. So, I was thinking may be we could grab some dinner tonight or something?
She : Sounds Good. I'm free tonight. Where are we going?
He : The usual, my place, cozy and comfortable for us to actually talk than a noisy or low lit restaurant.
She : (In a reverie of confusion that's running in her mind) Alright! See you at 8
Talking to herself :
Am I making a mistake? He was the boot...
He said "I'm a bad guy"
She said "No you ain't"
He said "I really am bad, you just don't know it"
She said "Then don't be"
He said " I can't help not being it"
She said " It's all up to you"
He said " Do you even know what being bad is?"
She said " Of course I do"
Being Bad is listening to that inner voice inside us telling, don't do it, it's wrong.
Being Bad is feeling guilty about all that you've done.
Being Bad is knowing it's wrong and still wanting to do it.
Being Bad is realizing everything that is happening to you, still you'd not want to stop it because you still want to be bad.
Being Bad is not thinking about the voice that's screaming inside. You just ig...
Something that's inevitable, or should I say unpredictable. Or could be both.
But life is something we always struggle in, like in the moment of despair it looks never ending.
It feels as if you might actually end up wanting to die. You would even reach a point where you tell this world, yes I've given up, and it doesn't really matter, and I've no reason left to live. And people who might have a little more courage to actually think, yes this is the end, I hate surprises let me end this life.
Is that right ?
Giving the pleasure of death upon yourself?
Or is it merely the play of fate, that makes you think that you have ended your life but in actual, has been destined to happen t...
Like the water that's been taken away the privilege to flow through the meadows,
Like the air that has been frozen within the ice capped mountains,
Like the sand dunes that you keep walking up and down,
Like the heart beats of a person fallen to sleep with eternity,
Like the mirage that shows water through the hot summer desert,
And Like me trying to breathe each time your heart gets squeezed, sucked and blended until you face another blow.
No water flooded, No Cyclones, No Sand Storms, No call from the devil himself, No Oasis's can put me out of my misery.
As this life has found its way to be Stagnant.
May be I have never been able to understand you. I've always thought to Love, was to share happiness, laughter, care, smiles everywhere.
But, the moment I've shared things to one, I'd end up hurting the other.
When I say I'm tired of doing this,
You send me the person who's actually loving me for my true self and yes I'd always end up hurting that someone.
I decide yes there is that special someone, and it might be it, I should open up, I should go bring my great expectations. Then it definitely will turn out to be the wrong one, that special someone is the one in the camouflage, who'd lure you in and tear you in flesh and blood.
After all this hurt, I end up living like the...
May be sometimes you'd never realize how fast it passes away. Good, bad, happy, sad with all kinds of moods.
Today was one kind of a day, where I started something new.
21 Days of waking up at 7:00AM, I know it might seem funny to you. But, for a girl who wakes up not less than 10:00AM , is a great achievement.
And hope this goes on for 20 of them to come.
A LETTER TO THE INNOCENT
Dear Innocent people,
This world has always been a tough place for you to live.
When you were innocent as a child, other kids stole your toys away,
When you were innocent as an adolescent,
your friends made fun of you saying you're too dumb to not know that,
When you were innocent as an adult,
you'd either be cheated by someone or be used.
Is being innocent a crime?
Sometimes I ask myself.
Being nice to everyone, not knowing so many twisty tricks, not being clever enough to understand the faces under the mask might have been my crime.
Like they say :
"Innocence reclaimed is just as powerful as innocence born"
So can the innocence be born again?
Cause all I...
Life is like a train,
Going through many stations...
The only question is,
The last station to reach would be
Death or Destiny.....
My Heart Around Thorns
So, have l became something that I'm not.? Are these devils in me eating me up, making me something that I'm not. Or is it me longing for care, attention from all the wrong people and destroying the reason behind that care. Why do I do this? Every night? Or was it just some piled up lust over a complete stranger. Isn't it the same? So do i hate myself for doing that? No I don't think so. So what? Then why are you thinking this much. You do it, then u say it's wrong, you know it but still u didn't wanna change. Then why do u keep poking thorns into ur heart. When it was all but your choice,. Why do u reside in between broken glass pieces,. Piercing inside,. Let it no...
Every Story needs to be heard, Sometimes it becomes unheard because it was not been told, or it was been told in a way it shouldn't be.
This story is something which isn't a story but a tale of living that has never been heard or told. But as long as you read it still is a story and someone has gone through it.