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CMB

PO# 517986
Australia
Australia
Just another sad soul, in a world full of sad souls. who better to shear my thoughts and poems with.
June 5, 2019
 

It's sad, a world full of people.
But you just cannot anymore,
You have nothing to say.
No subsistence,
Nothing to put out into a world full of people

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MADE WITH LOVE
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March 7, 2019
 

Being afraid of my own mother, she has a darkened mind.
Being afriad she'll hurt me,
More afraid she's going to hurt herself.
Being afraid of her mind all it that it can do, her reality it doesn't fit mine.
Theres a stranger inside.
To see the hatred in her eye's, their dark and mean.
They can look at me with pride.
Being afraid of her voice, the vicious words she spits.
She can use words of wisdom.
Being afraid of the day the darkness will settle like a mist over our house,
when will it come?
How long will it last?
Will this time be the time my mother doesn't make out of her darken mind?

-MOTHER, DARKENED MIND.
       -C.M.B

LIGHT LETTRS LOGO
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August 15, 2018
 

Look to the star's,
See their story.

Watch for the rivers,
Hear their song.

Be guided to the Sea,
Hear it's roar.

Follow the tree's,
Listen to their whispers.

Reach for the earth,
Feel its warmth.

Be still, be steady, be silent,
Be guided by the earth, listen to it's sounds, it will take you home.

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LOVE IS ALL WE NEED
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November 3, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

Oh anxious skin, today you are all consuming.
As you spread all over my body,
You are red raw, you are tight,
You burn and sting all at once.
No cloth can touch you.
No joints can bend.
Today my mind is darkened.
I cannot bare the pain and saddness that you bring.

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CELEBRATE ART
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October 15, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

I hate how i melt when you are around
I hate that all i want is for you to be happy
I hate that i wish you all the best in life.
I hate how after two year all my feelings for you come rushing back.
I hate that i remember all our 15 year old promises.
And how much they meant. Too me and even you right now.
Most of all i wish you were here with me cos i don't hate you at all.
I miss you
I love you
I hate you
Forever and always
All my love

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INTO THE GALAXY
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September 30, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

And it all flashes in front of you.
It's blinding, it's burning, it's hurting.
The half truths, the full lies.
The pretending, pretending they cared, pretending they felt anything at all for you; that sad, sick, drama filled girl.
He didn't care, he didn't feel, he lied and he pretended.
He stayed silent or he lied.
There was no truth there,
He hurt the sad sick girl
He filled her up, he lied, he made her feel something, something she hadnt had for a long time. It was joy, it was happiness, it was light.
and then he left.
He left her there alone and confused.
He was Silent, no feelings there at all, he didnt care, not anymore.
Because who would ever care for that sad sick girl?

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LETTRS BLACK AND WHITE
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September 2, 2017
 

To lay beside you and listen to the wind,
Cuddle up with you in the rain.
Feel your touch in the night,
To know you are there.
To feel safe even though you are not here.
I wish for you. I long for you. I hope for you.

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ENDLESS STARS
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August 21, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

In this day and age,
Goodbyes are no where to be found.
With one click of a button,
You can vanish.

Connections are made, a click here or there. You think there is a deep connection but really there is no substance at all.
Ending things, are easy now.
Avoid, ignore, ghost.
The funny thing is they try so hard at the start, to pull you in.
To charm you, they say all the right things at the right time.
Then they vanish, they leave..
Goodbyes are now a thing of the past.

ENDLESS STARS
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August 19, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

Closed off n shut down.
Walls up, there never coming down.
No thoughts or feelings will leave these walls.
Locked up, no lock to find the key is gone.
There is nothing here for you, behind these walls.
No time or space,
No actions or words can knock it down.
You can't get in, it's over now.
Just silence now.

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PHOTOGRAPHY DAY
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July 15, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

I just want you to see me..
To really fucking see me.
To see me and like me for who i am.
To not be so afraid of your feelings,
To really feel them and to really see me
It's the saddest thing, i know.

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FIND PEACE
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July 2, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

You built me up, as high as the tallest mountain, for what?
To slowly pull me down, one ledge at a time?
Why am i so afraid?
Is it because i know the last ledge is approaching.
There's no substance here anymore,
As i wait at the edge on this last ledge,
I know there is nothing left here at all, not for me, not anymore. 
You built me up, you made me swore.
And now?  I've crumbled to the floor,  worthless, i am nothing at all.

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RUMA ZAIDI
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June 14, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

Why don't you ever ask about me?
Is it because I'm not important or that you just don't care?
Why don't you ever make an effort? At all?
Why are you keeping me at a distance?  
Am i just in the background incase things fall through?
Why doesn't the lack of action speak louder than your words?
Why can't i make up my mind? To just walk away from you, and your lack of anything at all?

Questions with out answers // new hope lost // CMB

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LETTRS BLACK AND WHITE
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June 4, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

I'm waiting, here and for what?
I'm afarid of losing something that's not even mine.
I'm waiting for something I'm pretty sure is never going to happen.
But like the fool i am, i wait. I wait for fate to intervene.
To take us on our journey to a place far from here.
To a place where i am me and you are you.
Where you don't put me last on a long list of worries.
Where it's me and you, against the world. Fighting our fight.
For fate to finally pick you up on our way out of here, to join me on our quest.
On our quest too freedom and peace.
But i sit and i wait for you and a fate I'll  never receive.

RUMA ZAIDI
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June 2, 2017
Indented Head, Australia

Maybe one day.
Maybe one day - you'll see the light that shines within me.
Maybe one day- you will let yourself feel, the emotions, i know you feel.
Maybe one day - you'll knock down your walls for me; like i did for you.
Maybe one day - it will just clique for you; that im worth it.

Or maybe one day - the light that shines bright within me; will dim just a little.
Or maybe one day - I'll stop my emotions; my feelings for you.
Or maybe one day I'll build my walls, strong again.
Or maybe one day - it will just clique for me; that im not truly worth it at all.

Maybe that day will come.

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ANGEL OF PASSION
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May 21, 2017
 

You are the sunshine, this peaceful, calm presence that I've found in my life.
At a time when all i could see was grey, you see i am the rain. A stromy, grey cloud that needs a peaceful, calm and quite sun.
It's only been a little while, my friend.
What you've brought me, is so much more, then I think you know.
Can you see me, Sun? Can you see the rain and how quite she has become? Can you see the peace you bring her? The smile you bring her, when the sun meets the rain, she smiles a little smile. She will giggle a little giggle, she holds your hands like she'd hold the rays from the sun on a stromy day.
It's only been a little while, but there's a little part of me that hopes it will be ...

ANGEL BREATHING
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April 21, 2017
 

My one wish

My one wish would be to have enough money, to buy land with a house and a couple of little fancey huts. Fully paid for, fully furnished.
Somewhere out in the woods or the country, a really peaceful place.
A place my family can come to, where we can all find peace.
Where my daughter has room to rome, have adventures.  

My one wish would be for a home  my family and i can have peace.

LOVE,PEACE AND UNDERSTANDING
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April 21, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

Some times all you can do is hope,
You see I'm not ready too give up.
I have to have hope,
Hope in you and me.
Hope that there is a time,
A time for you and me.
My heart was ice,
It was black.
My walls were thick,
The walls were stone.
No one was coming in.
But you did it,
You melted my heart,
You brought the colour back to my heart.
Your broke down my walls,
And turned the stone to dust.
So i have to hope that you'll see what and who i turly am.

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WHAT DO YOU SEE?
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April 18, 2017
 

Now that you've found me,
Now that I've found you -
Please don't give up,
Don't let this slip us by.
Let's try,
Let's give this a chance.
I'm not going anywhere,
I'll wait.
I have hope and faith in you, in me, in us.
I know if i don't wait, if i don't try, if i don't give this a chance- I'll regret it and the pain of regret is forever.
I'm not regretting, not with you.

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LETTRS CHALK
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April 17, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

Thank you for coming into my life,
Thank you for showing me joy,
Thank you for showing me im worth it.
Thank you for being you.
Thank you for giving me your time.
Thank you for inspiring me to be better.
Thank you for being the reason i smile.
Thank you for those little moments of time you gave me, they mean the world to me.
Thank you for making me feel beautiful.
Thank you for the butterflies.
Im hoping one day ill get to say thank you for staying by my side, even when i tried to push you away.

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LETTRS BLACK AND WHITE
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April 13, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

And i still wonder,
On a cross road in the middle of anywhere.
And i still wait,
At the cross road,
In the middle of here n there.
The moves not mine to make,
But i still wait n i still wonder.
Are we going there?
Or am i going staying here,
At the cross road?

LETTRS BLACK AND WHITE
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April 10, 2017
 

The night sounds,
The noises that the night makes,
They are a reminder, that you're not here.
You see i liked the nights,
The nights with you,
The silence of you,
It made me feel safe,
It made me comfortable.
The silence of you,
Made me feel like i could be even more then i am.
I know the sounds of the night now,
And in knowing them,
I know that i am more then i ever thought, i was.

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LETTRS BLACK AND WHITE
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April 3, 2017
 

I'm still worried.
That in the end I've waited for nothing,
i think that will be the hardest thing of all.
For me to be left waiting for you
And for you to have never came back at all. 
For me to be here waiting for the emptiness,
The nothingness I'll be left with.
Is it sad that i wait for a fate,
A fate that may come with so much deviation?
I don't have the answers,
And that's what is most frightening of all.

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LETTRS BLACK AND WHITE
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April 1, 2017
 

Don't let your past effect your future.
Don't let fear get in the way of your happiness.
Don't keep yourself from happiness, because of the hurt from times since gone by.
Take your own future by your loving hands and pull it close.
Don't punish yourself because of things that happened in the past.
Don't make decisions based on the past.
Trust your gut today,
Be fearless and be brave,
Nows not the time to make judgements because of the past and people from your past.
I wasn't there, don't punish me for the wrongs done by others.

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LETTRS BLACK AND WHITE
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March 31, 2017
 

I'm lost on you,
In a forest full of trees.
I can't see,
But i can feel,
I can feel the mistrust,
I can feel the confusion.
Through the trees,
I see,
I see you, standing in a sea. 
Confused,
Full of mistrust.
Look through the trees, step out of the sea,
Look into my eyes,
Look into my heart,
Look at me,
Standing here,
Waiting for you.
Look at me,
Look at me.
Just look at me,
I'll see you again,
This time not through the trees,
Not in the sea,
I'll see you,
When you look at me.

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ANGEL BREATHING
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March 26, 2017
 

You make me feel all these incredible things.
You make me think about my future,
A future; before it was just day by day night by night.
Now i look forward to a tomorrow.
The silence, your silence; it doesn't scare me.
I'm not scared of what tomorrow will bring,
I'm not scared of you.
I worry and i think to much, i still worry that all this will just blow away, like a puff of smoke.
I worry because you haven't seen me on a bad day, on those days i know you truly won't understand.

But i have hope now, i have faith; faith in you.
I feel so lucky when I'm with you, im lucky i meet you, im lucky you are you.
I want to spend every day and night with you already, i want to see what the futu...

OPEN HEART
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March 5, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

The wispers of the tree swaying in the wind,
The wispers of hearing your own heart beat,
Nothing else.
When silence is crushing and the hurt is real,
You most remember,
Silcence isn't full of questions
But full of answers.
All the answers are in the silcence.

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ANGEL OF PASSION
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January 22, 2017
 

She will never be told to shrink, to shrink her voice,
She will never be told to shrink,
To shrink her body or her life into what society tells her too.

She will never be told to shrink her smile or her attitude to fit into some mold the world thinks she needs to have because she is a girl.

She will never be told she cannot do that because she is a girl.

She will never be shamed into silence because she is a girl,
She will not be told to stand down because she is a girl.

She will never be told who, what or how she can love, she is a human who desveres respect.

She will be bold, she will be proud, she will be brave!
She will stand up for her rights, for truth and justice!

She is ...

LOVE,PEACE AND UNDERSTANDING
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January 17, 2017
 

And sometimes all the sound stops,
The eery silence,
Seeps deep into my bones,
My heartaches with the stillness of it all.

And sometimes the sound of my mind is so loud,
It seeps deep into my soul.
My heart shatters into tiny splinters that spread far and wide.

Sometimes i feel like im drwaning in a sea of stillness,
Sometimes i feel like im floating on a sea of my heart's splinters.

BASEBALL
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January 17, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

And some time's all the sound stops,
The eery silence,
Seeps deep into my bones,
My heartaches with the stillness of it all.

And sometimes the sound of my mind is so loud,
It seeps deep into my soul.
My heart shatters into tiny splinters that spread far and wide.

Sometimes i feel like im drwaning in a sea of stillness
Sometimes i feel like im floating on a sea of my heart's slinters.

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ANGEL OF PASSION
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January 8, 2017
Box Hill North, Australia

Yes, some days are dark and rotten,
Somedays it all becomes to much.
If only you could see what i see,
If only you can see yourself through my jaded eyes.
You shimmer and you shine,
You glow from within.
Even on the days you feel dark and rotten
You still glow.
You still shine.
You are many things,
Not just the dark n rotten things.
You are not broken you are whole.

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LETTRS BLACK AND WHITE
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