I use to be a open book....
But now I'm like a vault barried deep in darkest part of the ocean.
Happy Anniversary to the Man who I call my love and fakes his happiness.
Happy Anniversary to the man who is the love of my life and I can't seem to help him get out of a hole.
Happy Anniversary the only Man who has truly made me happy!!!
I OOVE YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MT HEART AND THE DEEPEST PART OF MY SOUL.
And you say to Me "let's decide together" when you had already made a decision.
So much for being this Amazing Great Perfect Couple.
And I was standing there in the beach, looking ahead of me and at the never ending ocean,
It was calm you hear the wind and the waves making a magical sound, I took a few steps into the water when all of sudden the waves got crazy the water reached my shoulders and a panicked losing balance and I couldn't feel the ground and in then I realized that it was all in my head I was actually walking on water, my thoughts had gotten the best of Me, just like that I new it was a Miracle that He was there, He had saved me in a storm that was all in my head.
And I worry about everyone and I take care of everyone but who does it for me?
I make sure everyone is alive and well and no body sees that I'm dying slowly so slowly so painfully that I can't even call for help!
I Hate it, when you call out for help and everyone just thinks your exaggerating! When the Truth is that you feel like you just hit a dead end, and everything is closing on you like being stuck inside a room with no windows or doors.
But yeah maybe I am exaggerating.
Sometimes it looks like a bump in the road, just to find out it was a crash on the wall.
Moments like this I wish I could fade away into dust!
He doesn't send cute text anymore or reminds me why He likes me.
And know He is always to busy to give me hug!
I talk and talk and try to comfort You, but it seems like all I do is look like if I'm preaching and I hate it!
But when I only listen You ask Me why I have nothing to say as if I didn't care when there's no one in this world who care as much as Me!
Sometimes He doesn't talk to Her kindly and others He gives Her a kiss on the forehead!
E & L
I don't want another fight!
I don't want to feel like am cussing a argument.
How can I explain in the kindness way that I HATE when you joke that you don't want me!!!!!
Just one week they said,
it’s nothing you’ll be fine!!
Well it’s the second day and I missed Him already!
It’s for his own good mama said to me, okay I want him to be okay. But I feel sad without Him,
I want him to come back from his trip already! I want to hug him and be with him!
Yeah I know I sound like in mature little girl,I even cried when he left, how stupid of me it’s just one week!
The question “when are you two getting married?” Scares me more than it should.
And it’s not that I don’t Love You because I would die for you!
And not because I’m doubting on You, because I trust You and man it’s more than obvious that your my soulmate, the love of my life!
But it killing me this fear, than even tho I want to run I stay in your arms because that where I feel protected!
I might not show it, but I am a little sad your not here!
All I really need it’s to lay on this green couch with you again!
I want that!
All that, that we talk about in our future all the things we wish for and imagine I want that, all of it!
I want a future with You!
Do you ever jut want to cry?
Not knowing exactly why or maybe it’s to much but you don’t know of all the reasons witch one it is that your crying for?
Well that’s me right now wanting to cry not sure of why but I’m trying to hold my tears, not because I can’t cry but because crying relieves and also hurts and pain is my phobia.
Far away or close together my love for you does not change, because Distances was made to make Love strong and closeness was made to make love ___________
I know you had a bad day
I know today was Father’s Day and your dad wasn’t there for you, and I know it’s been though this past weeks, But baby please kiss me and hug me and don’t get annoyed because of how much I need you.
Sometimes a grown up girl will need you but won’t say anything because we don’t want to seem to needy or annoying, so I write this here so I’ll express myself and let you be.