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Haley bug 🐞

PO# 226663
United States
United States
24 💜 | Mother of 2 🧬 | Take me as I am or leave me as you found me. 💯 | 2 Peter 1:5-9 🙏🏼
May 23, 2019
 

These next 6 days need to fly by fast. I’m excited to Find out what my baby is ❤️

Baby M is already so loved, I’ve had my family talking about her since we found out I was pregnant.

My son is excited about his new little sister he talks about her all the time.

Today is the 19 week check mark.

I’ve felt baby kicks Here and there.

I’m too excited to see the look on my stepdaughters face, my husbands face, and my sons face when they say what it is.

Then pictures for the announcement after 😍

6 more days!!!! 💜

WHITE CLOCK
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May 21, 2019
 

Today was a hard day.

Last night was challenging too.

Last night, a guy I don’t ever wish to remember from my childhood popped up in my Facebook notifications and my heart stopped for what felt like eternity. I went to his page to block him never to think of him again, and noticed that my older brother and his girlfriend along with a very good family friend who I consider a brother, were friends with him on Facebook. That’s how he found me. It’s got to be. Because my name is different than when he knew me and I don’t look the same.

The 3 people who went through this tough time when I was 8 years old with me, because of this man, are Facebook friends? Why? You can only imagine how I felt...

WHITE CLOCK
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May 20, 2019
 

You know what frustrates me the most?

People who can’t seem to keep their mouth shut and their nose out of other folks business. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I’m at my breaking point. Literally.

Someone somewhere always has an opinion about me or how I do things, how I care for MY kids.

It’s never ending. And it makes me want to take a major society break.

I’m thinking about another social media break along with blocking quite a few people from contacting me.

Today, I’m setting boundaries and deleting apps.

I’m going to focus on myself, MY kids, and MY relationship with God.

Everyone else can take their opinions, “helpful advice”, and “friendly help” and stick it where the sun don’t shine 😎

Haley El...

WHITE CLOCK
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May 18, 2019
 

From a young age it’s always been a dream and goal of mine to graduate college, get married and become a mother to 2 kids. 1 boy 1 girl. Not too far apart in age but not too close. Boy first so he can protect his sister when they’re at school. And last but not least, bug a house in the neighborhood I grew up in for my family to be raised in.

I’ve accomplished one of those goals.

I got married and I became a mother to almost 2 kids. Waiting to see if this last child is a girl or not.

I want to be an ER trauma nurse. It’s always been my thing.

I like the adrenaline rush of having to think on your feet and act fast.

I’m really good at that part. Sometimes. 🤣🤷🏻‍♀️

Everyone around me is...

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
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May 17, 2019
 

I’ve heard that my kids are “oops babies” and “unplanned”

Today I had the realization that my children are part of God’s plan.

It may seem silly to you, but to me this is a sign from God.

Encouragement, if you will.

When my husband and I got married it was 2013. He had 1 daughter. Her name is Maddison. Maddison has 3 syllables.

3 years later in 2016, we had our son Malachi. Malachi has 3 syllables.

3 more years later in 2019, I’m pregnant with my second child, his 5th. 5-2 is 3 he has 5 kids. I have 2. Our child’s name whether Boy or a girl will start with an “M”.

That’s 3 kids that start with the letter “M”

Can you guess what my husbands favorite number is?

Yup. It’s 3.

M...

GRATEFUL
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May 17, 2019
 

Today was rough.

My son was being horrible to me. He bit my hand. He stomped on my feet. He hit me multiple times and kicked me.

On the way home from the sitter we got into a small car accident. A lady wasn’t paying attention and merged into my lane with no blinker and ran me off the road.

It was nothing but God because my son was in the car with me and nothing was damaged.

My car doesn’t look like it was hit. It drives just fine. The air bags didn’t deploy and the only thing wrong is my neck went stiff from it snapping when I hit the curb.

I could’ve hit a pole, a tree, a house, even a pedestrian. That’s how I know it was nothing but God.

To top off my day, i haven’t eaten much ...

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
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May 17, 2019
 

My mother in law will always be one of my biggest supporters.

Whether her son and I are together or not, she’s always there for me to help me wherever I need it.

Lately it just so happens I need someone to talk to who has been through this situation.

I need someone’s guidance on how to stay strong through the lies I hear of “I didn’t want this. I wanted us to work on things” or “i still love you wife” or just constantly being called “wife” like it’s a title that I should wear proudly right now.

I’m weak when it comes to my husband. I can’t help the fact that I still love him with all of me.

Going through what we’re going through right now is definitely a challenge for me. Him maybe ...

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
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May 16, 2019
 

My heart will heal.

My life will go on.

With God as my defender, I’ll continue to be strong.

I heard a song tonight that broke me down and is going to help me be strong.

Strong in my decision and strong in the Lord.

I’m just the past couple weeks actually, I’ve lost a mom. A dad. And a husband.

No they didn’t pass away. They were tired of playing their roles so they decided to go in with their lives and I’ve decided to better mine.

I deserve something better than what I got. Honestly.

Everyone can have their opinions of me all they want but I’m going to come out better than I was with everything I’m promised.

Good luck to my mom and her journey

Good luck to my dad and his ...

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
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May 16, 2019
 

I’ve heard a lot that I suck at being pregnant and I used to agree with it.

I honestly thought I  just sucked at being pregnant.

And then I talked to the dr and a few other women who worked in the gynecologist office and have also been pregnant.

My last pregnancy was HELL. Literally.

It sucked!!!

I was sick every day at least 20 minutes after eating.

I would eat a whole meal. Feel good cause I finally ate a whole meal and then BOOM! upchucked  the whole fricken thing.

I ate a donut and I kid you not, I upchucked it and the fricken thing didn’t even have time to digest in my stomach!

I woke up in a puddle of my own blood because I went into preterm labor from what? I really don...

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
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May 16, 2019
 

It was lonely last night.

I had a rough day and an even tougher night and i just wanted to cuddle my son and cry.

I wanted him to hold me and play with my hair like he always does.

He’s coming home today and I wish I could be selfish with him and just not give him back.

I wish it was possible for me to pull the same crap other women have with their kids.

“I don’t like her and don’t want my kids around her.”

“Nope come to my house to see him or don’t see him at all”

It’s hard being the baby mama with some sense.

I don’t want my child to suffer just because of my own personal feelings of one person.

It’s easy to hate someone but learning to accept the things you can’t change a...

DO RIGHT
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May 15, 2019
 

Haley.

A name that sounds sweet to some, sour to most, and blood boiling irritating to few.

Its the name of a daughter who has given up trying to help the mother who can’t even help herself.

It’s the name of a wife who did what she could and tried her best but still wasn’t good enough.

It’s the name of a mother, who’s standing strong and learning how to be a single mother to almost 2 children.

The name Haley, holds weight in heaven. It’s in the lambs book of life and on the list of “women rebuilt by Gods grace and love”

Haley is the name of a strong, loving, passionate, and goal oriented individual.

Haley is the name of a successful woman who wants for nothing because she knows ...

MAKE YOUR MARK
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May 12, 2019
 

Happy Mother’s Day y’all!

Today I spent time with my baby. We took a 2 hour nap together and went to my aunts to spend some time with her.

All in all it’s been a pretty decent day. ❤️

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
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May 11, 2019
 

The amount of hurt and pain I’m going through is something I never would wish on anyone.

Seriously. No other woman should have to feel the pain and sadness I’m feeling all because of someone’s hurtful words.

It pains me to think that I’m really all by myself. I’m really a single mom.

I wasn’t built for this to be honest but if there’s people in this world who can be single moms to 2 children then so can I.

I don’t even really know what to say to people.

We split. It was my decision to leave true. But would you stay if you were told a bunch of hurtful things?

If you were told you were a bad parent, that they didn’t want more kids with you, and that they aren’t in love with you.

W...

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
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May 10, 2019
 

Today’s the day.

I’ve cried 3 times already.

What a wonderful day to be hormonal and pregnant and cry at the drop of a hat 🤣🤦🏻‍♀️

It’s been hard today already.

This is not how I intended my life to go, however I’m very excited to be moving into my own place.

Thanking God for the opportunity to shine by myself and the love and strength he’s given me this far ❤️

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
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May 9, 2019
 

I think the worst thing I’ve heard this week, is

“I never wanted to have another kid with you”

And...

“You’re going to divorce before the baby is born right?”

1. Ouch. If that was the case maybe you should’ve taken precaution as well since you had no intentions of having more children. AND no good intentions of being with me.

2. NO ! If I can help it, I won’t be divorced until after my child is born. I’ve never wanted children out of wedlock and I’m not about to start now.

I did things right. I dated, married, then had kids. My grandfather isn’t turning in his grave because of me doing things the opposite of what he nailed into my head. That’s for sure. Maybe because I married a bla...

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
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May 8, 2019
 

I got almost everything we need. 👏🏼

This feeling, it’s like when you start a new job and you’re excited to learn. You’re excited to perform well!

This feeling I’m feeling is like no other. I’m super excited about this new chapter.

I’ve got it all almost under control.

Trusting God in the mean time.

Blessings on blessings alllll summer long 🙌🏼

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
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May 7, 2019
 

It’s perfect!!

The perfect little place for my perfect little babies.

This was way easier than I thought it would be.

I can’t help but think this is what God had planned for me all along.

I didn’t feel out of place or anxious when I walked in.

I got my support system ready to go.

I got the cash on its way.

Everything is falling into place. ❤️

Blessing upon blessing this summer ❤️

CHASE DREAMS
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May 6, 2019
 

For so long I’ve had to hold it together and hold myself up.

Today, I had my breaking point.

I had my turning point.

This next chapter is everything I did NOT expect it to be.

Honestly, I’m disappointed. Hurt even.

But I’m a mother, even though most would say a horrible one, I do my best in the high stress situations.

I’m a mother and I have to carry the weight for my children now.

The children that I WANT.

And it doesn’t matter to us who wants them and who doesn’t.

They have their mother and that’s good enough for now.

Blessings will be coming down the road for my children and I.

Pray for our journey as we walk this road alone with the guidance that God provides.

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
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May 5, 2019
 

There’s a lot of folks that doubt me.

There’s a lot of people who thought, “no way could she graduate with a highschool education”

But I did. I may not have a high school diploma however, I fought to get my GED.

They say “she will never be able to be a mother to 2 kids”

I’ve had training for this. When I met my husband he had a daughter. My stepdaughter. When my son was born we had to juggle 2 kids maybe just for a few days at a time, however, it still trained me for this moment.

There’s people who say “she will never be anything more than her GED.”

Little do they know, I have big plans to buckle down and become the nurse I KNOW I can be.

I’ve had someone tell me “you’ll never b...

DON'T BE AFRAID
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February 15, 2019
Rockford, United States

Goodbye sun.

Goodbye moon.

Goodbye stars

And goodbye to you.

A delusional fantasy is a place I do not wish to be.

Claim who you wanna but in the end, you will not succeed.

It’s crazy to me that someone will go to such lengths just to see you lose. To see you not have what God has promised you.

But that’s what demons do.

They come to steal. Kill. And destroy.

Steal a husband. Kill a love. And destroy a marriage.

They don’t want what you got.

They just don’t want YOU to have what you got!

Continue on in your false hope and delusional, sinful ways.

I’ll live my life the way God intended for the rest of my days.

Things will soon change.

POSITIVE LIFE
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February 13, 2019
 

[Verse 1]
Ask me how I'm feeling
I'mma tell you that I'm chilling
But my temperature could be through the ceiling
You wanna be the villian
Like ooh-ooh killem/ ooh killem (Me in my feelings)
'Cuz oh no, don't speak on things that they don't know
It's so hard trynna let it go when tweet hit my phone
Made me wanna act crazy but I can't say that they made me

[Pre-Chorus]
We be like (eeyoooh)
I love my haters
Then we let'em dictate us
Then we look like a fool
When we lose our control flying off of the radar

[Chorus]
I know your emotionful but don't letthat take control
When your emotional, emotional
No don't, don't/No don't, don't, don't
You might be going through it yourself
But don't lose it
...

LEARN FROM YOUR FALLS
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February 11, 2019
Rockford, United States

Today was a busy day for the paramedics of Rockford.

Tonight we had a resident get sent out, the paramedic standing with me waiting for the gurney was telling me about how he’s ready to go home and it’s been crazy.

I asked him what he saw tonight he said “well we just came from a car accident scene, I’ve been to at least 3 of those tonight. The weather isn’t the greatest. Now we’re here and I’m pretty sure I just heard a call for a domestic violence with injury that we will have to respond to after the other ambulance takes your resident”

I was envy of him.

I have been thinking a lot about what I would like to do.

I’ve been talking myself out of the career I want to go through with....

LET'S FALL IN LOVE
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