As she sobs and looks at a picture of God right it front of her she asks herself, "Is all of this a part of the bigger plan? HIS plan? Who is He? And why does he get to decide everything?"
Oh no, it's not his doing ,WE are the creators of our own destiny.
"Well then, why does it not go as per our plan?"
Because you are not in control of everything, so it's no use worrying about things you cant control.
"If I'm not in control of these things you say, how can I be the whole and sole creator of my own destiny?"
Something different about winter nights,
Lights; in the sky and your eyes,
Charging me up;
Oh, the thought of that vice.
Something cold yet warm about the atmosphere,
Chills in the air and my sultry spine,
This hot rush - I can no more decline,
Another inch closer to commiting the lustful crime.
Something familiar yet unknown,
The touch of your body, the escaped moan
Our hearts racing as we breathe so slow-
Now a light tickle, a tiny bite,
My inhibitions defeated, with all your might.
Something seems misplaced yet in place,
If it's a sin, I'd go to hell locked in your embrace
Legs intertwined, it's a heating furnace
Imprisoned by passion, possession & perspiration as we sway-
Good evening ladies and gents. Here's my two cents about a part of the situation in this pandemic.
With the advent of COVID-19 and everlasting boredom even a person like myself who is rather unfazed by most things in life was forced to take keen notice of certain patterns in our giant home : Our World.
COVID-19 is impartial, it doesn't differentiate on the basis of colour/political power/money. Everyone from a high-class movie star to a homeless person could be it's next target.
It's ironical to see some of my friends who moved to another country just a few years back now looking down on their own country where they were basically brought up saying it's not as advanced...
Whilst on the ode to fulfillment,
I'm lost in translation;
Of thoughts and desires.
Am I a half? Am I whole?
What is it that,
Makes me feel a little empty,
A little shattered,
A raging soul ?
Is it the touch of a lover ,
The kiss of a mother,
Or a significant other ?
I hate to feel this is way-
To lie & say that I'm okay,
No matter what I do,
Sleep it off or paint a doodle-doo,
The rancid feeling unshakable,
As time & everyone else runs by,
Amidst a sand storm- i
Alive but captured,
Find myself in the hellish kingdom:
Of torment & misery,
A slave now -
As I bow low,
All hail the great king - Grief.
What can i do to ease my pain?
Listen to the sounds of the ocean?
Meditate my way into ultimate zen?
But it is this pain that has kept me sane-
So it comes in like a hurricane,
Reducing everything to a plane,
Now i can not just hear but really listen;
To what comes after - the rain
It's neither chaotic nor inane,
Each drop in symphony with the other,
Like music that heals, from nature mother,
I shun myself on this, for I smother-
The collateral beauty of pain,
The more I try the more I fail:
At the art of embracing it ,
Without letting it consume me bit by bit,
I cannot succumb yet, I cannot retreat !
This is the unfinished story,
Of an impending feat.
"We're here, We care
From behind keyboards
Anonymously , we fare."
Do you believe it too?
Maybe it's true
But the nights I spent alone
Would always be mine
And mine alone
The tears I cried
And the wishes I dreamt
Are privy to me
As they should be
But what about the promises
Of the better world,
Or shall I call it the lesser worse world?
To hold my hand through the storm outside
And help calm the one inside
It's all talk no show, you know
Every night I tell myself
It's just another night
Hoping someday, the day would be so bright
Blinding all the memories of those nights
And the reality would seem
better than the dream
That's the day I shall decide to stay
Crushing the dream o...
Just another night
But is it really?
How many such nights
Until I realise
In the shade of the trees,
You seek sanctity,
Of whom solitude is a close friend,
In the shade of the trees,
You stroll in peace,
Still in search of a missing piece,
In the shade of the trees,
Up you must see,
For the sun is right above,
Sending rays of hope & love.
//Take a selfie, fake a life.//
Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat,
How many more of these to @
Your "socially woke" pals,
To let them feed,
Off of your insecurities,
Go on sister, broadcast these lies;
Lies you weave-
To stay in this paradise place, please
It's a mirage mocking you,
A glistening water body of fake lives,
In the vastness of desertic reality,
Or maybe its a sport:
Person to get the most numbers,
Of "hearts and comments" wins
The Game of Fame,
Awardees get more such "Friends"
Stealthily crawling their way in,
And finding their way out,
Eventually leaving you,
Stranded in saharan sand dunes.
You never really heal,
Even if not completely,
Most of it does fade away,
You always carry little remnants,
Some amount of damage,
Added to the previous rampage,
Almost like an old lineage,
Yet you keep going,
Like a warrior, shining
Proud of her battle scars,
To the world it may seem so,
But this warrior is also-
Haunted, by her gruesome past
Now a changed person,
Naturally, in the dislikes of many
Clamouring her way,
Through the maddening chaos,
To the door that reads,
"Happiness and peace"
Little does she know,
That this door doesn't show,
Simply because it doesn't exist,
It's in those short-lived moments;
of silence in the chaos,
that life is to be trul...
it starts where
most stories start
mistaken for a
novelistic happy end
too many temporaries
lead to a happy end
it never ends, actually
keep dying on the inside slowly
the process -autolytic
as i would become
in the time to come
if not by natural causes
I'd have to go
unnaturally, funnily so
by something that
doesnt let people go
How to love someone? -A hack.
How to love someone?
Nobody knows for sure.
But when you do-
You come back,
You come back; to the same place
Over and over again,
Again; when its better
And when its not,
Walk away; but not beyond
the point of return,
For if you do-
And love isn't for the weak.
But weak or strong,
If not to heal invisible wounds,
To toughen the unhurt,
Love someone but be courageous,
Be courageous enough to accept failure,
For a human is too complex an equation,
To be solved by a simple formula,
Love with the hope,
The hope to rise together.
You'll find love in every little corner,
Even the darkest of places,
Consider it inexhaustibl...
=The Final Chapter=
Can you see my face?
Can you see through the smoky haze?
Can you feel my skin?
Can you feel the warm blood rushing in?
Can you hold me now & keep me close?
Can you stop my mind, from wavering into chaos?
Can your eyes read me?
Can you tell my story?
Are you here to stay forever?
My book's running outta pages,
It's The Final Chapter.
I'm kind of in a vulnerable place right now.
I won't say I'm the best in my class but among the best few or I was amongst them. But lately I haven't been scoring so well, maybe because the praises got to my head or whatever I dunno. Well, naturally my parents also expect the same result as always and anything below it is unacceptable to them.
Some of my practical exams weren't so good, kind of blanked out in the viva voce and the teachers said things.. that I obviously didn't want to hear. However the last blow was from a teacher that I really really respect and admire and he too was.. well, unimpressed. He hinted at me not clearing this year. And that was too much. Maybe it's not such a bi...
Trapped in the past,
For my own good,
Every time I got past
It, the present
Didn't seem so pretty after all,
Was scary in fact,
B'cuz I knew that-
Fighting new demons,
Was more exhausting,
With the ones from before,
Chose the easy way out,
Decided to stay in,
Only till it felt okay,
To be not okay;
Again, embrace the present
Lose the fight, brace myself
Go back to sleep, dreaming
Of the demons from my past.
So fragile, could break with a twist
Those lean, clean wrists
Bearers of watches, untimely slits
Reminders of moments missed,
And all those times someone pulled you up, fists
Fostering fury, strength
Symbolic of courage, to change
Fingers, lingering on a lover
Subtly tracing contours,
Some rugged, with calluses on the crevices
Letting you know of a passion,
Or profession, skill
Prints, markers of unique identity
And the middle, gritty
An astrologic map to one's life,
Conferrer and seeker,
Of blessings and alms, palms
To hold them all together,
To do good and uplift one another.
I see those prying eyes,
I hear those voices rumouring,
And I know I'm not the only one;
But that doesn't make it okay,
There's a reason a person behaves some way-
I don't believe the things you say,
Right on, about someone
So dead sure, as if you witnessed it
It's those ears, I know
Ever so attracted to gossip,
And that over-functional mouth,
Gladly spilling the beans, words
Sounding like one thing, meaning another
I don't blame you,
I too was like this before,
It's a repetitive action, a habit
I can't reform you, and I won't
But I can reform me,
So I ask questions, to my heart's content
Till it feels okay, to believe
Because I know what it feels like;
To be on the other end, of this sto...
Stop it! Let me go,
You call this love?
It's the worst kinda feeling,
I've even known, so
Don't call this control freight "Love",
You couldn't probably visualize,
That the one thing I absolutely despise,
Is exactly at the core of your love-
A form of bondage you've made,
More than pulling me closer,
You've pushed me further away,
My heart caged and feet enchained,
With shackles of iron wrought,
Outweighed other things your love brought,
How I wish things were better, if not sweet
If only you'd let me fly a random fleet,
Paint the town, walk an unnamed street.
Was it too much to ask for?
Was all I believed a total lie?
Sigh, the end is real nigh.
It's exactly a month to my birthday. (I don't know why/how that is relevant here, but well..) I was studying in the reading hall for an exam scheduled later in the afternoon. Mind you, it's pitch dark but I'm certain I heard a rooster go coo-ka-doo-coo. Sit back, hold still, grab your popcorn, here it comes- while walking back to my room there was this dog waiting outside the reading hall, and for no good reason I felt like he was there, just for me. *chuckles*
So I lightly pat his back, as I usually do to my dog-friends and got on my way. But this doggo wanted to play at 4 am in the morning. He jumped and frolicked around me as if he were challenging me to some sort of...
it was easily one of my
best nights ever
smoked a cig and a half
listened to the chillest playlist
never felt better
in that moment
i was never so in love
i could see my reflection
on the phone screen
was never so in love
with the cold
even my body
so overwhelmed with
the smoke or
or the happiness
that it reacted
spilled my guts out
in the toilet
still the happiness
was never so in love
with my shivering unsteady hands
the texture of my hair
the way it felt
on my face
and in that moment
you couldn't hate loneliness
its the best time
you could ever get..
It feels like just yesterday,
When all we did was play,
On the swings and the slides,
That still remember our joyful cries.
"With the blink of an eye, time passes by.."
Now we're in different places,
Day & night,
To support our families,
And fight our fight.
Some of us studying,
Till odd hours of the night,
Dedicating our lives,
To saving others lives.
While some of us who're-
Adventure freaks & nature lovers,
Out with those biker jackets & bikes,
Taking nature trails & risky hikes.
to the tunes of DJ Light,
While some sleeping away,
to numb the pain & feel okay.
All I want to say is,
Everything will fall into place
And you wouldn't even know...
And in love,
With the idea of love.
The idea, that paints a portrait;
Of your beloved,
In the colours that don't exist,
The idea, that tells you;
That love is waiting at your door step,
Dapper in a tux, with flowers in his hand.
Wake up! Love is at the foot of your bed,
With a warm cuppa coffee, breakfast
& the prettiest smile on her face.
The idea, so vivid;
Yet so strong,
That it makes you believe,
If you have been in love before,
And been broken,
It is okay, cuz
Broken crayons still colour the same way,
And if you haven't,
Then it will be an experience of a lifetime.
A life, where everything will hurt a little less,
And your world will be pink.
You're almost intoxic...
The sun knows you too -
When dawn has all but slipped away
When sun starts peeping in from the horizon,
Prepping up himself with the talk you had with moon
The sun knows all about you.
The sun wonders how it is to feel same
Across days, in agony and pain.
He feels the same everyday,
And yet acts the opposite way
To make sure it's okay
To be whatever you want to be,
For the moon to be whatever it wants to be -
Auspicious & omnious,
And the moon waxes & wanes,
Whilst illuminating the dark blue skies
The sun silently burns out for him
Illuminating the moon just right
Not dimming the pretty little stars.
The sun loses out on admiration
For being punishing and harsh
Only the moon knows you,
It feels like the same way-
Different each day,
That infact it is okay-
To have phases & eclipses,
To be auspicious & omnious,
And as it waxes & wanes,
Whilst illuminating the dark blue skies
A sight for sore eyes,
Not dimming the pretty little stars,
Unlike the mighty
bright sun without the scars,
That everyone loves and adores,
In all it's serenity & humility,
Looks at you and says,
"I know. I've been here long enough to know that it'll be alright."
The moon child.
My heart is in recovery-
from it's fictional infirmity,
regaining fresh colour,
with love 'n hope-
still yearns to go back;
to somewhat sad,
guess that is what they call-
The Millennial Rad.
Friendships aren't meant
To be perfect
Cuz what's the fun
In sailing through smooth seas If there wasn't a little bit of a storm
Once in a while?
I wasn't like this before,
But I had to-
Circumstances were to thank for,
Then I got addicted,
Addicted to this state of misery,
And loved it enough
Enough to let it kill me.
"The more you try
to make sense
out of things
the more they tend
to lose meaning."
So here's a chill pill💊
Take it & SMILE.
I've been here long enough to notice that literally so many of us are hurting in some way or the other and find solace in lettrs: A place where you can freely vent all your feelings and emotions.
Usually, I have knack to go off topic and make things complicated but I'll keep this as simple and to the point as possible.
Please bear with me.
Friends, believe it or not I've been there too and I kinda know what it feels like to give someone all of yourself and never be at the receiving end or just feel like you don't have a purpose/reason to live any more.
I understand how when something goes nothing like we expected it to, we blame ourselves which is obviously NOT...