|a semi normal lady who loves my children so much|
Right now I'm struggling with my relationship. I'm having a hard time getting on with my life. I've gained weight and I am so depressed. I'm still looking for a job. But I'm trying to take care of me and that's hard to do. I've gained 15 pounds and I'm so mad at myself it's ridiculous. Oh well I guess I will just have to try harder right?
I choose to ignore you cause you're so dumb . Just the thought of you makes me numb. I choose to ignore you cause I'm so nice. If you think of crossing me you'd better think twice. I choose to ignore you and walk away. I'm not living life thinking of you day by day. I choose to ignore you and that's how I feel. If you don't like it then that's your deal.
Going to Florida to have some fun. Getting drunk as hell off peaches and rum. Going to forget and have a great time. Leaving the previous day's stress behind. Dancing and eating getting loud. Wild and free drawing a crowd. Today I'm reddkiki someone totally unknown. Oops sorry I didn't answer the phone.
I'm going to Florida tomorrow. I haven't been on a vacation in a long time and it's way overdue. I'm so happy. I have an issue I have to deal with when I come back but tomorrow is all about me and having fun and getting drunk. I can't wait!!! 🐚🐚🐚🐚🐚🐚🏖️🏖️🏖️🏖️🏖️🏖️🏖️
I feel useless now. I feel empty . I feel like I'm falling and I don't know how to stop. I feel crappy. I feel unwanted. What am I supposed to do now??
I'm not rich by far. I don't have a lot of money for do I drive a fancy car. But what I lack in money I make up for it with heart. And to me that's a start. I'm not a glamorous bitch not at all but when people need me I'm on call. I'm always there no matter what. Whenever you're in a rut. I don't think I'm better than you but I have been through a lot in life and it's true. I've seen pain beyond all measure and I'm the best,an awesome treasure.
Twinkle twinkle Little star I'm the dumbest chick by far. Up above the sky so high. Let me ask you why. Why do you always lie. Twinkle twinkle Little brat how I wonder where you're at. Trying hard to fit in. Don't you know you'll never win. Twinkle twinkle little bore. Do you think you need some more. Trying to figure what to do when no one wants to fool with you. Twinkle twinkle Little queen don't you think you're being mean. Telling people not to dream. Twinkle twinkle little bitch guess I'll go and pull the switch. On you and all your friends. Now it's time to make amends. Twinkle twinkle little late. Don't you know it's you I hate. I'm sorry for being mean but it's your fault or so i...
I'm sorry for not being the best person in the world. I try so hard to be what others want me to be. I'm exhausted and I'm struggling right now. Sometimes I feel like I'm slowly fading away. Like if I close my eyes will I wake up. What about my children. I love them so much. I'm supposed to be enjoying life not wishing it would end.
I am me that's who I'll be. I'm not you that's not what I do. I am weird your are not. I am an alien or have you forgot. Stay in your lane and I'll stay in mine. I'm only here for so long but you've got time. I don't belong here. You do. You like me I love you. I am not like anyone else. You can die I can reform myself. I'm leaving now but you don't know. I must blank your mind before I go.
I wake up in an abandoned building. How did I get here? I don't remember anything. I went to dinner with friends then we went to a local bar. Maybe I had too much to drink? I get up and walk around trying to get my bearings. I look in the far corner and there's a package with my name on it. I see a note. It says: you asked for this. You didn't want your life anymore so you have to start over. This is your new place. In the box is $1,000,000.00 you can spend it on furniture or what not. But your life as you know it is over. If you walk outside you will not recognize anything because its a whole new city. You have a new job and new friends. Starting now you will go and enjoy yourself. I begin t...
Guys are always telling me how beautiful I am and how I can have any man I want. Yeah I can but I don't want just any man. Shit I'm trying to get rid of the one I have now. He doesn't want to do right. At all. Then on top of that there's this one guy who likes me but he's 47 and I'm 41. He's a nice guy but he lacks confidence. He's scared of me. Me!!! Shit I'm scared of him. He pretty much has it together but I can't date him. Hell I don't want to be with anyone. All i want is to be able to do is make sure my kids are ok and then I will see.
My grandma passed away last night and I am so sad. I know it was her time to go. She lived an amazing life. 95 years? That's awesome. I cried so hard and I'm crying now. I just wonder how much longer am I going to be here? Then the strangest thing happened... My ex's grandfather passed away too. I feel like its a sign that I really need to move on to the next level of my life and be the woman I need to be. It's going to be hard but I don't have a choice.
I'm thankful for life and my children. I'm thankful for my parents and my brothers. I'm thankful for my grandma and I'm thankful for me.
I don't ask for much , just a hug , a little touch. But all I get the coldest shoulder. Like running into a big ass Boulder. All I want is to be loved like it was before. But when all is said and done it's never more. I've cried all I can now I'm depressed. It's gotten so bad I've got stress on top of stress. It's all my fault I let it get too far. Now here I am sitting in my car. Wondering how I let it get this bad I'm scared to be alone and that's just sad. I've got to pull it together I don't want to be this way forever. I'm tired I'm raw from crying. Sick of all the lying. I'm done with you and your bullshit. Here's my letter now I quit.
I have this friend. She's my age and has three kids. She's seeing this wonderful guy he's five years older than her . He's really good looking and he pretty much has his life together. The problem is in the bedroom. Yeah he talks a good game but he is not that good at showing. She says she really likes him and wants to see what happens but she's scared of another bedroom disaster. What should she do? Tell him or show him how to do good in the bedroom?
There's a fire burning deep within. It doesn't have a beginning or an end. If you touch me I may explode. I suffer from sensory overload. There is no cure just lots of love making and it's all yours for the taking. There's a fire pit in my stomach and I'm going to burst. You are the only one who can smoulder the flame . Just make sure that you are game. Can you handle it? Are you up for the task? You know how people can wear a mask. There's a flame within my soul and putting it out is your main goal. Can you help me i only have one chance. Show me how you do romance.
Shhhh! I can't talk too loud he's in the other room. I am leaving. I can't deal with this anymore. He's so arrogant and he's not like he was when I met him ten years ago. His words hurt me so much and I'm so mad at myself for falling for him. Oh no!! I- I gotta go!! CLICK.
What if I told you that I'm in love with another man? Well I'm not. Because I'm trying to pick up the pieces of my shattered life and I don't know what to do. I was in love and I was happy. But something changed. I couldn't deal with the little things like the smoking or buying things instead of paying his bills. I mean I did love him at one point. But it fizzled out after a while. Shit right now I'm faking it so good it's unreal. I need to get out while I can or else...
Another birthday has passed and I'm 41 now. June 21st was my birthday and I couldn't be happier than I am now. I mean I have everything I need. A wonderful life a wonderful family and no friends. Lol. I'm good. I went to a reunion picnic two days after my birthday and I had fun. But I think it will be the last time I go. Anyway.... I'm still working on my life. I'm ok but not really.
I have gained probably about 10 to 20 pounds over the past few months. When i was in highschool i weighed 175. You couldn't tell because it was all in my thighs. But now that im older.... It's like i have to lose it like now! I dont want to lose much maybe 10 to 15 at the most. The reason I've gained weight? No clue. Just kidding its because of my surgery. All i wanna do is eat. Lol. But my fiance says he loves me for me. I know this but im doing it for me. I love me.
To everyone who's lied on me, lied to me, cheated on me, stolen from me, abused me mentally, physically, and emotionally, used me for their own personal gain, made fun of me, talked about me, talked down to me, I forgive you. Thank you for making me a better person.
Domt go to bed amgry cause you may say something you'll regret. Cool down before you talk and when you do apologize. Thats the problem now a days people go into a relationship blind. They dont know what they're getting themselves into. And when they've been with that person two or three years the mask comes off. Be careful . when the mask comes off you may not like it.
I had a hysterectomy in December. I feel weird and bloated. My doctor told me what to expect but i guess im in denial. I feel like im still having my period even though im not. Are there any support groups out there? I mean i know i had to have the operation because if i didnt id be in so much pain.
Ive been on social media for two years now. And honestly, im sick of it. I mean i know people are on social media to keep in touch with everyone, but honestly, it can ruin relationships and friendships if you allow it. The more i went on facebook the more tired of it i became. Families are ruined and theres lack of communication. I cant stand it. When i was working thats all i would ser. Everyone texting or looking on their pones. Kids paying with their tablets. Not interacting and just not communicating with each other. Its sad. When i was young, we went outside, played until we got tired. Now theyd rather be on their pones, ipads and whatever else there is. Yes i have a ...
Lately ive been in an awful mood. I dont feel like me. I feel weird. Like I'll dive under a rock or something. I feel sad i feel awful and depressed. I look at my pictures and i ser a huge difference in them im sadder in each one now than others. I Love me but not really.
I don't have any issues with Halloween. Heck I used to dress up when I was younger. I even let my kids do it. People are gonna do what they wanna do how they wanna do it. They're grown and no one should tell them hey Halloween is a pagan holiday. Or hey thanksgiving is not right because they robbed and murdered the native Americans. Or even, hey you shouldn't celebrate Christmas because its just a way to get all OK f your money because hey Jesus was born on this day people are gonna believe what they want. Its not our right to judge them. I saw a lot of people on my timeline dressed up in costume. The same ones who were hollering about how we were being done. Hey that's their pre...
I have been down lately. Depressed and sad. I don't know what to do anymore. But I woke up one day and I was a different person. I don't know what day that was. I've decided to not worry about stuff because when something good happens, something bad happens and so on. Its called a chain reaction. I'm gonna smile and keep moving forward. I have to. Otherwise I would have a nervous breakdown. Pray for me please.
I'm bipolar. Ive always been this way. I hate it. Some days I'm up other days I'm down. Sometimes I'm in between. Right now I'm down. Tomorrow I might be happy or agitated or something like that. I don't wanna take medication but maybe if I do it'll even me out. I'm scared that I'll be locked up in a mental hospital and my parents will get my kids. But I need help. I'm afraid that I'll seriously hurt myself. I've been through hell and back. Now you know. This is true. It's real. Goodnight all.