|On my fridge, you'll walk through my thoughts. Take a look :)|
At 18, finding a love that lasts for a lifetime is difficult to find. Now at 24, I am lucky when it has come to relationships. Fortunately, I have had just one. Yes, one. I am scared when it comes to making it official, plagued with this superstition that the more people have a peek into your personal life, the more attention you attract, and become a magnet to the vibes they emit. Its the negative ones that upset me.
Talking of this love ( the one that lasts a lifetime) I found it. I fell hard, fast and irrevocably in love with my best friend in higher secondary school year. Now its been seven long years since we passed out, and even now, its just him that makes me melt. We have shared our...
A girl's perspective.
You dont go out seeking for men, and put a tick on your checklist, see if he scores a 8/10, evauluating him by the standards, the high society set for you to follow and then say you're in love. It's not only the degree he gets in law, finance, banking, medicine, technology, or whatever fancy degree they say it is, that defines him. It's not the rich parents he has, that vouch for his guaranteed financial status in life. It's not the expensive things he says he'd buy you, or the places he promises he'll take you on holidays, that define him as a person. It's when you're at a low and he is with you trying everything in his imagination to make it a tad bit better for you, ...
My dearest Boo,
I hope I can call you that,it makes me feel closer to you .:)
Just a few hours as we step into a new year ,end of a whole journey of 365 days .It had been a happy year for me even with the disappointments .I can say I have started living life again ..and I would thank you with all my heart for the day you came to visit me ,patiently heard mom's stories and wiped the tears .
That day and this day,I say I have started living again..loving again .You even though in the backdrop or in the silence play an inevitable part in my life and your absence wont affect it in any way because I feel connections of the heart are way to difficult to break .
I pray for all the succes...
It's time for another mark of time, time to begin afresh and 'trust the magic of new beginnings'.
When I look back at my school days, I remember the new year greeting cards that I received, on the first day after school re-opened. I've managed to store quite a few of them in my box of memories.
Then, the digital world took over and we had Facebook status updates substituting the personalised greetings which bore names, and the effort that went into choosing one card that would suit your friend, best. How one spent hours in the cards shop, hunting through heaps of greetings, reading and re-reading what was written in them before one selected it ! It was sweet pain !
The digital generation ...
For the love of food.
There are those who go to a restaurant and eat their 'usual' almost all the time they venture out.
Then, there are those, who go places, try new cuisines, experiment with new things on the menu.
I belong to the list of the second. We eat, relish, savour the flavours with our eyes closed, registering how it satiates our culinary senses, try to figure out in our minds, flavours of the elements, and save how we loved them in our minds, so next time we want to not experiment with places and have something "nice", we know we have a safe place to go to, our tummies, awaiting the aroma of the dish, and rumbling inside, as if asking, "when are you going to get that right in ?"...
December has, since a couple of years been my favourite month. I was in a different place then, and until then December didn't mean that much, apart from the cakes and food goodies that came with all my Christian friends and acquaintances. Of course, the week from 20th onwards meant socialising, but I never did it with all my heart.
Something about the windy stealthy winter now brightens me up. I remember the beautifully lit up Park street in Kolkata, how I sniffed the warm essence of cakes and bakes while crossing paths at a bakery, how magical it really was.
Quite recently I have started counting my blessings everyday, so it helps me sail through the stormiest of days . I have thought ov...
The world, on occasions more than I can quote, joined hands in prayers when terrorism waged war against humanism. We rejoiced while watching the Olympic games together, residing in so many different parts of this planet. We applauded the victory, felt sorry for the beaten, and encouraged them for the next journey.
The world, on 9/11/16, was shaken, taken aback at Trump being the President elect of The U.S.A.
When, Mother Teresa was canonised a saint, we prayed silently, with a heart full of gratitude, and an inexplicable emotion, for the soul she was ! Some things are better illustrated by real instances from life, so is the invisible bond that connects humans all over the world. We stand t...
The sooner she learnt,
that even when alone,
she was strong,
strong enough to take on the world,
the better she would live.
Life takes drastic turns.
It's almost like a splash of ice cold water thrown at your face and you stand there with glassy eyes, unable to comprehend what just happened.
How do you stay in a place, even if you call the place your home, when the last ray of sunlight of your existence is snatched away ? What is a town without your closest friends ? You can't be happier for them when they find their opportunities calling, but there is a sudden realisation that you're going to be left alone. You dont know whether to smile or get angry with them. They have to go, eventually everyone does. There is nothing you can do about it. Their memories haunt every place you try to go to, alone, and you end u...
There are these 'nothings' to write about, when you spend your days of leisure basking in the glory of those nothings, because other days are as busy as everything that runs the world, work, call of duty, elements of worry, the harbingers of stress, and amidst this, life must go on. So I find my days and hold in to them for peace. Winter is here. My favourite nights, the cold windy ones. We have in our minds, the idea of a perfect moment; scenes from movies clouding our minds so dark, that we hardly believe that our perfect moment is happening right here. Now.
These are my nothings. These sweet days when I have the desire to laze around and can afford to do so. I'll speak of one such event t...
I wish I were a witch. One like Hermione. Wait, didn't Lewis Carroll say, "everyone wants things to happen magically, but they don't believe in magic", which goes to say, we are all witches and wizards in this world. Saying that, I want to cast a spell : Piertotum Locomotor and bring to life these amazing fur babies we have spent our childhood, holding them like our sanity depended on them. We used to sleep on them ( some of us still do), cry on them and they'd soak it up. How full of light our world would be, with our favourite teddy bears walking along !
We were taught being kids, that motion is relative, that it was motion always in terms of the person static in one position viewing the object moving.
I should have learnt, that these lessons even apply to real life, and that, watching or comparing my life to someone I barely know, admiring how glamorous or interesting their lives are, while demeaning mine, is only one way of looking at it. I should have learnt that this person's life was in motion because only I decided to be a spectator.
Sometimes lessons learnt in childhood should be held on to, like multiplication tables, like twinkle twinkle little star. I wish I had learnt to believe more in myself than being worried about what the wo...
This perhaps is going to be a letter I have had to think over and write, for writing to me generally is in the spur of the moment.
It's like an idea that suddenly strikes you at any moment of the day or night, or a scene from your every day life, and you want to do something to remember the whole thing. Painters paint, photographers take pictures, while we write. A few months back, lenovo had this ad, #wethedoers. See, I can even trail off and gladly come back, saying that I did.
What do you do when you want to have a circle of people who you know you can be yourself with, reveal that side of you which is most precious, and not be judged even if you aren't as good as others are, those peopl...
Cést la vie
I have the flowers you gave me tucked inside the box carefully. They've dried. The essence is long gone. The sheet of plastic you used to wrap them, has loosened it's grip.
When I see them, the colour of reddish black, the hue of dried blood on a sheet of paper, the picture of them when you gave it to me, flashes across. I wanted to preserve them fresh. No man before you ever gave me flowers. I was taken by surprise when you brought them. Like joys are, short lived and fleeting, the beauty of flowers wanes the moment they are plucked.
Like all things that have life, perish, they did too. Everything that has life, that was once young will become senile. They have to give way fo...
To the world,
I am a woman, and fortunately in my 24 years of life, J have had more experience with men who seemed loving, kind hearted, and protective than those who wanted to cause me harm. I have had the misfortune of coming across men who molested me, and in the process, a huge part of me lived in self doubt and insecurities for long ; It was a man who helped me out of my darkness and into the light of truth.
I am a feminist, who knows that there are men, good men in this world, a fair share who believe, we females form as much part of this society as them, and we share equal rights to live our lives liberally.
With changing times and the ongoing debate about feminism, and supporting it,...
If there is something I ask for God, let that be your light that obliterates self doubt, and insecurities which prey on me, being the barrier that misleads me from doing my best.
I seek strength to bear the outcome of my own doing, which, if not in my favour, I struggle, resent, and close my eyes to the faults in me.
You test my spirituality as much as you put to test, the rest of us. There are questions everywhere. Let me open my heart and mind to see what you intend me to see.
On reading Memoirs of a Geisha -
By Arthur Golden.
This book I have read which gives me an insight into the tradition of the Geisha of Japan, and a few instances of how the commoners were aghast with horror of the impending gloom during the years of World War II. I haven't known much about the Geisha, but from what I come to know of this first hand account , the numbers have plummeted to lows where it might only be found in history books. So many beautiful things have been crushed, by jealousy and hatred ! It's a pity, that true Geishas may never be found again, the art lost to tragedy of time. I remember watching The Last Samurai, and a quote from the movie left an imprint. " From the mom...
I find it rather intriguing how we, humans function. Sometimes, we hide the best of us, as a savoury only for ourselves to steal a taste of satisfaction we the need be. We'd make a few excuses, lie if we have to, and even the most pure of conscience won't feel guilty, if it involves revealing this side of her to the world around. It might be anything that we regard high in our opinion. A habit, a certain interest, a certain behaviour, anything. The reason behind shrouding, might be the misgiving of not being encouraged to indulge in it as often as we want to, or being chided at, even the fear that this special thing might be taken away from us.
From what has inspired me to write this, I und...
The Lettrs Café.
In my figment of imagination, I see walls, of four different colours. One in chalkboard black, with frames of typographical 26 alphabets adorning the wall, industrial lamps hanging down the ceiling. Another wall, painted in white, where there would be a huge corkboard, for pictures of the café as it evolves down the passage of time. A framed picture of Drew and the co-founders hanging above the corkboard. Well, they deserve to be known.
The two other walls, one painted in a shade of yellow, with a red letterbox standing tall ; the other with protruding bricks, where there would be a counter top, coffee machines (smiles), grinders, mugs,saucers, and coasters. At one end, th...
She bled love. Her heart, a sponge for absorbing the appalling, helpless, the sick and poor. Her calling, undeniably benign. Known to us all as a mother,
She healed people, with so much her kind and tender heart.
Being canonised, the official Sainthood being conferred upon her, now she stands recognised, amidst the most humble, dedicated and loving workers of God. Although a saint, she shall never cease to be the divine mother she was known as.
I wonder why didn't I tell you how beautiful you are ! You're an ocean of possibilities in yourself, harbouring millions of thoughts, emotions, desires and ambition.You're a magnet my love. You are yet to know what an amazing woman you are becoming. I stand by you, every moment, caressing your smiles, laughing with you, wiping your tears in silence. You cry often. Don't you feel ashamed; that helps you get up. You think bottling up gall is wise ? Trust me, venom is better spit out than carefully stored.
You send a dart to hit my heart when you look at me straight into my eye. That gaze, so powerful and intense, makes me want to hold you in an embrace.
Flaunt those dark curls wit...
The Gemini woman fell off bounds for a Capricorn man . Checked their compatibility a hundred times over sites online, and not one said, they were compatible. It scared the shit out of her.. She knew the traits of his sunsign. Oh boy ! he was quite something.
The hard working, nerd of a man, a friend who knew her as she was, in her worst and the best, who wasn't interested in wooing women, yet had a simplicity that she couldn't help, but fall head over heels for. She tried to keep this to herself for a year, even staying away, hoping it was an infatuation and would fade off, but damn, cupid had struck !
He however, didn't have a clue about this ride he was gonna take with her..
" Don't bend ; Don't water it down;
Don't try to make it logical;
Dont edit your own soul according to fashion;
Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly. " - FRANZ KAFKA
I belong to the difficult troupe of fickle minds, A Gemini that I am. Those days when my mind plays games, and I am unable to win against myself, this is one quote that helps me do what I ought to do.
How do I close my senses to the stinging regrets of my past ?
How do I make peace when on days, all I dwell on the possibilities of could be(s), and with a heart full of anger, with tearful eyes, look upon the things that once were.
How do I tell myself, my choices will do me justice one day, when all I have today is misgivings ?
How do you know which choice is the one that's right for you, when you are equally passionate about both choices ?
There shall always be defeat,
Clothed as an instrument to push you
to the edge of those rocks,
from where you'll fear a fall straight down.
There, along with fear, arises another probability, "Oh my dear, what if you fly ?"
From nothing, from the despair of doing what we do usually, and grief at the never yielding results, reaching that edge of rock takes tremendous change. Metamorphosis !
Green tea and Black coffee
Scene: A dining table at home.
Dad : The coffee you make tastes much better than any other I have had at a coffee shop. Lets get rid of the instant ones.
Dad: Your husband will be lucky to have you make him such nice coffee every day.
Dad, he prefers green tea to black coffee.
Dad: What ? Who ?
The hills are growing on me. More after I have returned back, from short visits to these places cocooned among the majestic himalayas.
These places are so calm, perfect for people who want a getaway from the clamour of work calls, the ruddy sound of vehicles, honking of horns that pain the ear drums, all day.
Only if I could stay there, and live until my senses are rejuvenated by the white clouds of snow that the mountains seem to the immersed in !
It gets me thinking, why there are more foreigners at these beautiful places, than our own people. Why is it, that they find more days to take a break while we take short breaks and hop from a world here to one at an end of another continent,...