#TT

I watched him from far afar as usual. I don't even know why I was lusting over someone so handsome, chilled and sooo much younger then me. We knew each other through from our friends. We have seen each other on every occasions. Birthday parties, garden parties, get togethers.

All I wanted is a little attention from someone and that someone was at the other side of the pool talking with a much younger and extremely good looking girl while I was sitting in my swimsuit, which of course was covering everything not like the girl with him. She was showing almost everything in that bikini. Everything!

I sighed looking down to my legs as they were in the water. I studied my tattoo for a sec...

You think you can but then you realise you can't...
How am I gonna realise that I can't have you?
Can't hold you...
Can't touch you...
Can't kiss you...
I have been waiting for so long to have you to have you beside me, to kiss you, to make love to you...

Please have me.
Only you.

The words can't come from my mouth.
The words can't come from my brain.
The words can't come from my heart.

They are just simply gone...

#mysmilewasgone

I woke up smiling then all I could hear is that "have you heard about the attack?" My smile was gone in an instant.

Manchester you are strong.
Parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends, partnerr, boyrfriends, girlfriends, children, families...

I am heartbroken.
I am totally heartbroken.

There were children, there were families to have fun, there were couples to have fun.

Some of them won't go home to their families anymore, some of them won't smile, won't cry, won't hug their loved ones anymore.

They went up to heaven. They went up to smile down to us.

I am totally, and utterly devastated.

I am so sorry what happened after the concert.

We cried today.
Thinkin...

#13word
#shorties

He transformed into his wolf form and looked back at her. "Change, love!"

I had a really good day today.
Garden party.
Hamburger.
Sweet potato chips.
The weather was amazing.
Really hot.
My sister in law is having her first car today.
She is picking it up today.
My partner is with her.
Kids ready for bed now.
I just need to put them in bed.
I cleaned the house a little.
I can't wait to sit down a little.
Just to rest.
Sitting. Finally.
I can't wait for my partner to get home.
I just need a cuddle in bed.
Tired. Sleepy.
But still waiting and watching a little tv.

Hope all of you had a really good weekend! I definitely had a brilliant one! ;)

This a snipet from Secure me (Black Guys and Gals #6). It's still not edited so sorry about the mistakes. Enjoy!

Carter's POV

"Tam!" I shouted after her as she turned right at the corridor and sighed. Fuck, this girl.

"What have you done?" Chase patted my shoulder and I shrugged him off.

"Just leave it." I told him and he smirked at me.

"That pretty nurse just told me that you need to get your papers at the reception." He told me and I nodded then I looked at him frowning.

"Stop your mind game, Chase." I told him and he chuckled.

"I am not playing. She is pretty." He winked and I wanted to punch him in the face but I knew he was just winding me up. He was pushing me towards this w...

The beach

When I opened my eyes and looked around I haven't seen anything special around me.

When I slowly sat up and blinked, all I could see was water.

When I swing my leg over the bed and felt the sand under my feet.

When I looked down all I could see is a summer dress. No bra. No bikini. No shoes. Nothing.

When I looked up again I could see the trees, the sea, the sand ahead of me.

When I stood up I felt how hot the sand was. My body was hot from the sand.

When I started to walk I felt the wind blow my long curly hair.

"Why was I on the beach...?" No one else were around me. Nothing only me.

When I started to look around I spotted someone walking towards me.

When I realised ...

This is me, answering the questions what Jen sent me. Thank you.:)

1. Marianna

2. 27

3. Hungary (Living in the U.K.)

4. 169cm (5'6-5'7)

5. Stay at home mum. Author.

6. I would say it's chocolate, Nutella or sometimes baked goods. Haha

7. Running and badminton.

8. Tom Hardy, Chris Evans

9. No.

10. From a friend.

11. Not easy to explain. Writing makes me calm down, it makes me live a totally different world. Love it!

12. I like poetry.

13. I am not a bad dancer but I wouldn't say I am good either lol

14. Yes, I can cook.

15. Yes, I can drive.

16. Gilmore girls

17. My best friend is amazing!

18. Resident evil: Final chapter.

19. Fuck.

20. Two days.

21. Got a scar on my chin...

So I was thinking about sharing a snipet from my upcoming book.

Your dirty little secret (Black Guys and Gals #4) Available for pre order on Amazon.

Hope you will enjoy it.

"First of all I want to thank everyone for showing up at such short notice..." I started and they nodded. I grabbed the paper from my pocket and handed it over to Thomas. He smirked and started to read it. I could see his eyes widen as he read each sentences.
"Hayden this isn’t good." He said and I nodded.
"You think so?" I asked him sarcastically. He shook his head and looked at Ted. I couldn't believe this was happening.
"What's going on?" Delvin asked and I rubbed my eyes. This was it. This was the time that I ne...

So today is my new book's cover reveal!!

So here you go!

*

What the book is actually about...

Ted is gay. He has a boyfriend. Until Delvin's wedding. He spots Hayden Travis, Megan's father and he is absolutly gorgeous. One night. One hot and steamy night with a totally straight and much older guy...

Hayden is straight. He never thought he would change his mind but it only needed one night with a perfect guy and he couldn't stop thinking about him.

Will Hayden fall in love and comes out or he will stay in the closet?

*

It will be available for pre-order soon.
Publication date is 30/04/2017. Only available on Amazon and Amazon Kindle unlimited.

Finished editing two of my books.

Soon to be published.

I am feeling pretty happy about it!

It hit me again.

Depression is a fucking asshole.

I can't deal with it.

Tearing up in the middle of the gym won't help but it sure as hell feels like my mood.

Doctors appointment is next month.

One month and I will know what is going on with me.

It will be a long month as I feel low and depressed again but I can do it.

I have done it for months in the last year, I will do it for the next month without any doubt.

But...

I am so feed up.

Please.

It's just a blood test.

Please.

Feeling you touching me, feeling me up, squeezing me so my body presses to yours.

"Damn, let me go." I whisper and I feel your breath on my neck.

"Do you really want me to let you go?" You ask me and I whimper.

"Please..." I whisper again as you kiss my neck and shoulder.

"If you stop me now I will never stop chasing you..." You tell me and look up to me. "You know me, love. I won't stop." You told me and I swallowed hard.

"I... I don't want to stop you." You grinned at me and I studied you for a second.

"Then don't..." he whispered leaving closer and kissing me. I kissed you back with everything I have, my heart was beating so fast in my chest. I felt your arms around my waist and I ...

I looked at him scared and backed up to the wall. He watched me not wearing any emotions on his face. I swallowed hard and looked all over him. He wasn't wearing anything just his boxer.

"What do you want?" He asked me smirking. My breathing quickened. He didn't remember me..? He should. He should remember me, he must have known who I am... I studied him as he turned his whole body to mine. "What's wrong with your tongue?" He smirked at me.

"Nothing." I spit it out and grabbed the door knob beside me and yanked the door open.

"Jennifer!" I heard my name and halted. I tried to even my breathing. This wasn't me. I was a strong women. I never gave in to anyone. Why am I doing this with him?...

"You broke my heart...

You broke everything in me."

By May

"Her body language told me she loved their attention and I don't  like it but I dont want to destroy her happiness. Drew went to grab a cd and signed it to her. She blushed taking it and I put my hands into my pocket. I hated it but I didn't move because I knew she loved me she won't.... she laughed on something and she touched Alex's arm.

What?

What is she doing? Why is she touching him? I swallowed hard and didn't move. I didn't move.... I wanted to... I so fucking wanted to but I didn't...

She loves me.

Then she blushed as Drew told her something. She was clinging to the cd what they gave her. I should go there and talk to them too but I couldn't. I leaned back to the wall and I just...

"A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool."

        William Shakespeare

So...

Today is my birthday. 🍰

I got great food, great butterfly chocolate cake and great family.

I am feeling blessed right now.

Still, I am getting closer to that number... the 3 X LOL feeling funny today I guess 😏😉

Have a great day!

I am gonna bath the kids, feed them, put them in bed, wait for my partner to get home and probably gonna watch something in the tv... I am thinking about Bones. It was a long time when I watched it and I missed a lot and it's almost finished.

Bye :)

          "Forgive your enemies,                       but never forget their names."

           John F. Kennedy

Sick of me (Black Guys and Gals #5) (not edited snipet,still working on it)

"I think I am..." I whispered closing my eyes. "But I don't want to destroy his life. I don't want him..."

"Enough." I heard a deep voice and my heart started to beat so fast as I turned my head quickly.

"Rick?" Him and Thomas walked inside and he probably heard me. I shook my head standing up and staring at him.

"Fucking enough!" He told me and I snickered. Wasn't the best idea to argue in front of our siblings and their new born babies.

"Not here." I told him and he shook his head.

"Who cares anymore?" He asked me. "I want to be with you, I want to live with you, I want to have you every day, I want to marry...

#POTTERHEAD

I slowly packed my bag, my owl and my essential items onto the trolley what I quickly grabbed while the taxi driver waited for me impatiently. He was a right prick but hell somehow I needed to get to the Kings Cross station.

I grabbed the muggle money from my pocket and paid for him. He murmured a rude thank you and I frowned as he left and I started to push the trolley into the station. I slowly went to the ticket office as I still didn't buy my ticket at all, I walked up to the lady who looked at me smiling and I smiled back at her.
"I'd like a ticket to the Hogwarts express." I smiled and she looked around and started laughing. "Did I say something wrong?" I asked her feeli...

I feel sick again.

I don't want to be sick. I just got healthy not long ago, I just went back to the gym and to running.

I hate being sick. I am gonna go and sleep all day now.

Oh.
That will be fucking impossible!
Why? You may ask..?
Because I have kids.
I think I am gonna cry in the bathroom and then get some energy from my left over coffee.