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M.D. Season

PO# 132958
Philippines
Philippines
Not much to write. A lot of things to right.
May 29, 2019
Philippines

Tired of always wanting to call you,
But can't.

Tired of breakdowns I want to tell you about,
But can't.

It seems to be so wrong.

It is not me. It is you.

FEEL IT WRITE IT
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January 10, 2019
Quezon City, Philippines

Lately I have been feeling very aggressive. I have a lot of issues, battles, problems, and conflict inside me that I keep. It must be about the family. Must be about work. Must be about everything about quarter life crisis. But endpoint is I hurt myself and everyone around me with words and actions because of my aggression.

I am aware of it. Of it all. I needed to stand back for a while to see the bigger picture. I knew I needed to have some kind of outlet for my emotional outbursts. Some kind of safe projection.

Then, I remembered writing. This has been helpful before and I know this will be, again.

Thankful for lettrs since the day I joined. It has never been this good to be back.

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KALEIDOSCOPE
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January 10, 2019
Quezon City, Philippines

Appreciation post for the one that matters to me right now.

**
My bed knows me well,
Whatever emotions I have, she could tell.

It welcomes me right,
Everytime I go home exhausted at night.

It knows the deepest.
The deepest sadness, happiness, and darkness.

It keeps all my breath.
From sigh of relief to a mumble beneath.

It catches my dreams.
During the days, even when on another realm.

It doesn't judge me.
Accepts the sad, drunk, the other sides of me.

My bed is everything I could ask for from a person right now. Rather, from everyone around me.

SEE IT SHARP
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October 10, 2017
 

I hope you are doing okay.

I hope, I am, too.

FACE YOUR FEARS
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September 4, 2017
 

I miss you in my sleep.
How you caress my body,
Just to feel the heat.
I miss you in my sleep.

I miss you in my sleep.
The way you wrap your arms,
Around me - felt like the world surrounds me.
I miss you in my sleep.

I miss you in my sleep.
Everytime I get a glimpse,
Of your face so close to mine.
I miss you in my sleep.

I miss you in my sleep.
Your scent itself,
Too aromatic not to think of golden sunflowers.
I miss you in my sleep.

I miss you in my sleep.
When you make me feel
- so secured. Safe. Loved.
I miss you in my sleep.

I miss you in my sleep, my love.

I miss you.

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POKA DOT PORTRAIT
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April 28, 2017
 

Imagine yourself..

Having a good time with the love of your life.

Socializing with your friends.

Doing what you love, with passion, and whole-heartedly.

One night you come home. Tired from work, but really happy with your current state of life..

But then, you get to see a packed luggage outside your door.

That's when everything stops.

You see. Hatred doesn't give a damn about everything you worked hard for. About everything you are passionate about.

Hatred is when your parents kick you out of the house just because you love someone they cannot accept.

Hatred destroys everything beautiful.

It is more powerful than love if not controlled.

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DREAMS
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April 26, 2017
 

Fuck myself.

For choosing someone else,
While you're chasing no one else.

WORLD STATIONERY DAY
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January 28, 2016
Manila, Philippines

Along the beach, with white-washed sand.
Facing the sunset, holding your hand.

Long walks, picking you some flowers.
lying on our backs, talking for hours.

Got myself a chicken, you getting a steak.
ponder on thoughts bout love that wont break.

Rom-com movies, each with a popcorn.
Then wanting to get your clothes torn.

Sit on a bench, read a book.
Going back home and then we cook.

Candle-lit dinner, surrounded with sweetness.
Pillow-fighting, jumping on the mattress.

All of these, I've been planning.
Not knowing I was just time-wasting.

Because maybe,
unplanned plans will always be best.
Than those planned ones.
Like us.

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LETTRS TAXI
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January 28, 2016
 

Write the most shattering thing you heard ever since, in 4 words..

i love you but..

ORIGINAL
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January 2, 2016
Pinamalayan, Philippines

It's been quite a job,
looking for a job.

However, it's been quite tiring,
chasing after you.

SUNFLOWER
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December 31, 2015
Pinamalayan, Philippines

It's been a rough year,
and you're still with me here.
Those rugged times,
your arms around my neck like vines.
Those vicious words,
I've told you along roads.
Our heavy breathing,
throughout all the beating.
Using are hands, wrenching..
hearts, shaking.

Yet, we stay.

Motivating each other,
Rendering the other a prayer.
Having each other's backs,
on the bed, ....

Ain't nobody can replace you,
and all the worst and best things you do;

Cheers to another year,
Cant wait to see you, dear!

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BRING IN THE NEW YEAR
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November 26, 2015
 

Tired.

Tired in almost all way possible.
Not that I want my life to end.
But tired on helping people continue with theirs.

Forgive me, this is just a kind of infatuation. This will be gone by tomorrow.

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PULSE
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September 1, 2015
 

You flew like a bird
I stayed as grounded as those of ants.

You were happy seeing the whole world,
I was happy seeing you seeing the whole world.

You always thought of staying; not that you want to, but you had a choice.
I always thought of leaving; but I did not have a choice, not that i don’t want to.

You keep on flying. And flying. And flying.
I kept on chasing. Chasing your flight, with as much view as I can get. Chasing. And Chasing. And chasing.

Then.

You are wandering, not alone right now.
I started wondering, why you are not, right now.

You seem glorious not being alone, flying, gliding, knifing through winds.
I, melancholic.

You carry your wings and the only view I want, away...

TYPEWRITER
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July 12, 2015
 

I must have been killed..

if      
              D
         R
             E
                  A
           M
               I
        N
                    G

was deemed to be illegal.

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APPREHENSION
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July 5, 2015
 

I found my Nirvana.
Everytime it rains..
And you're with me..

And you sing to me the song of Ever lasting love.

LOVE WINS
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July 5, 2015
 

"But he kept finding new pockets of shallow inside himself. He kept finding new ways to betray her."

Eleanor and Park (p. 178, last 2 sentences)

Why do we always have to do something to hurt the one we love? ugh.

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VINTAGE INDIGO
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July 2, 2015
 

Reading my 2011's diary entries.. All the love in it...
Not much different from the heterosexuals.

No offense. Just Love, guys.

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LOVE WINS
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June 30, 2015
 

I was just there,
waiting for the other.

You came crossing,
some aisle in
the summer
alone, bravering.

I started to startle,
we stared a little longer.

With your eyes wide open,
I was lost in the galaxies.

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STELLAR STARS
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June 29, 2015
 

Sad that I couldn't marry the one I love.
Sad that I know there will still  be people to judge.
Sad that there are 1 man 1 woman marriages which ends up in divorce.
Sad that it could've been a perfect chance for an Lgbt couple.

Sad that people will still think God doesn't love and accept everyone.

Just when I thought God will judge.. what are you doing then?

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DON’T GET LOST
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June 20, 2015
 

I waited for something
more sure.
Something I haven't had
before.

Along the horizon
my gaze on its millionth pass,
Yet still on the know
if something could last.

I wondered then,
if there's something to ever end what embarked..

Then I came to realyze..

it wasn't the Love I thought I was waiting for,

I was after the pain, the hate, the hurt, I was asking for so much more.

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ORIGINAL
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May 29, 2015
 

I looked at you and realized how lucky I am.

To look at that kind of glorious face, and share with me a moment no one could take.

You looked. You smiled.
Past thru me,

   
and there.
                                                I died.

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LETTRS CHALK
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May 4, 2015
 

You FELT me when I was invisible to the world.
You CARED for me since you started missing your periods.
You ATE a lot. Healthy and much-not.
You SUPPORTED me, crawling, creeping, sitting, standing.
You HELD my hands all the way.
You KEPT on smiling each time I smile, or I get dirt over my face.
You, CHEERED for me when I tripped. Over so many times.
You ACCEPTED me for who I was and what I'm going to be.

And now..

You still do it. All of it. And you just keep doing it deeper just for the love of me, your ever hard-headed daughter.

THANK YOU MOMMY, for accepting whole-heartedly the hardest job here on earth. (for free)

I LOVE YOU.

HAPPY MOM'S DAY!!! :*

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I LOVE YOU SO MUCH
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April 26, 2015
 

Gusto na lamang kitang mahagkan,
makasama hanggang takip-silim sa mga daraan na araw.

Gusto na lamang kitang makita,
sa tuwing ako'y masaya at sa tuwing ako'y lugmak sa lupa at sa pag-iintindi ng ibang tao ay uhaw.

Gusto na lamang kitang maamoy,
bawat hawi ng iyong buhok, bawat galaw ng iyong kamay at bawat pagdaan sa iyo ng hangin sa anumang direksyon.

Gusto na lamang kitang marinig,
maging ito'y sa pagkainis mo sa akin o sa paglalambing mo na sana'y nasa piling mo na lamang ako palagi.

Gusto na lamang kitang matikman,
iyong mga labi na kahit tignan ko lamang ako ay malulunod na sa lubos mong pagmamahal sakin. Matikman na tila baga sa ating pagpapalitan ng ating instrumentong panalita a...

KISS
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April 20, 2015
 

Describe life without lettrs app?

Just me reading my own stories and poems.

SAD.

LETTRS FUCHSIA
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April 20, 2015
 

we've been so wrong lately..
    
       but hey, tell me what else we could be.

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LETTRS CHALK
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April 12, 2015
 

Hi,
I know I tend to be stubborn, and at times foolish.
Yet just so you know, mixed emotions helped me to be like that.
I know I make you mad, I make you crazy, I make you pull your own hair or simply make you frown all day.
Yet just so you know, my hormones did that to me.
I know your life is complicated. The people around us makes us complicated and we make them frustrated or disappointed and judgmental.
Yet just so you know, my soul is calmed by yours.

I know we are against all odds.
I know we're like a butter laid on the frontyard during high set of the sun.
Yet just so you know,
my love for you will keep on holding on.

P.S. This is an open letter. And also, a letter I will be sendi...

LOVE
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April 8, 2015
 

because
I will hurt you,

no matter how much
I tell you I love you.

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LETTRS SHERLOCK
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April 3, 2015
 

You.
Me
Them.
We.

All ineffable.

Different characters.
Different ideations.
And yet,
still tend to associate with the other.

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MYSTERIOUS DOOR
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April 1, 2015
 

I love you everyday,
of the year.

You loved me like it was
always April Fool's Day.

LETTRS CHALK
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