The Lost Friend
Another arduous day to begin with. The rain had given no signs of calming down even after two days of continued turbulence. The town had come to a virtual stop, there were hardly anyone on the streets and rightly so; the IMD had passed a flood warning, earlier today. I had just arrived at the place a couple of days ago, in search of a lost friend who my other mates claimed to be living there. It would seem odd to explain that the reason I was there in search of her was to get a piece for my story about the memory we created years ago.
She was my first actual friend to be precise, at least the first person who approached me. We were around 10 when we first met, it was her p...
"Sometimes we pull so many things out from our hat that it becomes impossible to get all of them back in."
"I don't seem to remember you anymore. You don't cross my mind during the busiest of days nor the loneliest of nights. It feels like I have forgotten how your voice sounds like, how that smile of yours comes about. You only appear like a haze in the memory down the lane, in the streets of our past. The ones I had been lost for long but still wandered nowhere but there. You were my companion in the innumerable walks my thoughts took me along, modifying and altering the universe for you and me to finally fit which the reality negated with silence. The unanswered messages, the unreturned calls, they don't cause my heart to pound heavily anymore, it seem to not matter. The perpetuity surrounding...
"I don't seem to remember you anymore. You don't cross my mind during the busiest of days nor the loneliest of nights. It feels like I have forgotten how your voice sounds like, how that smile of yours comes about. You only appear like a haze in the memory down the lane, in the streets of our past. The ones I had been lost for long but still wandered nowhere but there. Finally there is this sense of freedom, a feeling of being on my own at last, without the baggage of disappointment and loss. The shackles that I had locked myself in is finally broken, and you, I don't remember anything anymore."
"Abhi na Jao chod kar, ke dil abhi bhara nahin..." hummed the radio as we got ourselves entangled in the long haul of a traffic signal. I looked towards her as the song played out and quickly looked away as I caught her attention. She was adjusting her hair, tying it up neatly while placing the diamond shaped bindi, just above her nose.
"I am ready." She exclaimed.
"Isn't getting ready something that needs to be done at home?"
"It's home when I am there with you." She shot back.
"Ah, I see. That's why you are leaving me and going?"
"Dumbo, I am going only for a week and moreover it's a ritual that the new bride should return to her parents place after six months."
"Who cares about the ...
“Humanity, love for a fellow human being, is it some sort of a bargain we have to dish out every time we meet or converse with an another. Does it come out naturally to us or is it forced upon, like the innumerable veils we garb ourselves with. Couldn’t we just enforce a default and forget paying back the goodwill which others generously spend on us. Why can’t we treat it as an economic good, scare and non-renewable, using it only when we generate profit from it. Isn’t manipulation a quality? Why is it seen as a crime? Why do people see me as a misfit when they do what I do but only implicitly? It’s a strange world out there.”
The invisible thoughts flew around one after the ...
"I lay there among many other envelopes at the corner of a dark room, the room which the just married couple had used for storing their glittery presents and beautiful bouquets that they had received at their reception. It was a fancy affair I must say which actually made me feel left out; I was a simple white envelope which didn't have even a tiny glitter at its ends, so you surely can understand the inferiority I was going through.
I was cramped here in this room for both space and breath as Paisa Bhai, a healthy looking envelope, had landed over me in search for comfort. It had a smell of wealth all over it which made it harder for me to survive as I tried with all my might to retain th...
"I opened the door and quietly sneaked in. It was pitch dark inside, with loud sounds of snoring coming from the other end. I tip toed myself towards the corner room where lay my prey, the one I had been commissioned to permanently rest. It was my first time and I was only eighteen then. My hands were shivering out of anxiety as the knife was slipping down with sweat; I whispered out the name of my almighty, our protector to pardon me for my sin which I was about to commit. I slowly peaked in to check if the room was locked but to my surprise it wasn’t so. It was an unpleasant one; I was in no position to kill someone even if he happens to be the one responsible for towing down my enti...
"Come to me on a greyish night,
See to it that you stay till the rainbow light."
"I always felt that it was me who had to apologise first. The spontaneous anger, the emotional fallout and finally the apology, they all seemed to happen at quick pace for me. I didn't wait a lifetime to apologise, I felt what could be corrected soon needs to be addressed first. So time and again I had a fallout with someone, I was the one to approach for a patch up. It did feel annoying after a point of time, especially when the mistake pointed to the other side. But a habit so organically inculcated wasn't easy to forego, even if it meant to be taken for granted by many.
The first time I realised this was when Priya and I parted ways. It was her decision which I had to honour, but my hear...
"The cello was untouched, the red lacing on the cover wasn't even undone. The present stood in their front room for over a week now, but Anu wasn't ready to open it alone. Though Adarsh had gotten it for her but she wasn't going to use it in his absence. He had gone to Europe to attend a conference, it was a week long session; the cello had arrived the day he left, it was a surprise he had planned for her. She didn't know that even the date of arrival was planned. That morning when she waited for Adarsh, she received a message from him. It left her shattered to pieces as she sank into her sofa with tears in her eyes. But her eyes were stuck on the cello; the tears kept rolling down but the ey...
"Either history is strange or the leaders ordinary, the events turn out to be no different than the past."
"Oblivious to the innate things that define one, we seek thoughts & desires alien to one to fit in the lie the world portrays with scary ease. Doubting the word, the paper, even our personal self, of ever writing a piece that would turn out to be famous one day. Writing for the sake of turning eyeballs, the words that gloss even in shade, to depict a gleeful you, the one who you know isn't even close to you. The unrestrained emotion, the element of honesty, the depth in pain, the fall of love, the ones which drive the piece crazy, the ones that truly define you aren't found anymore. They have been neatly tucked deep inside our shelves, not to be found, not to be searched ever again. Occasiona...
"Can we?" I said in a nervous tone.
"Why won't we?" Came a prompt reply from her.
We hugged and kissed before we fared each other a final goodbye. We were going away in opposite directions to different regions all together, but our resilient love wasn't going to fall apart so soon.
"Will you?" I shouted.
"Always forever." She shouted back as she disappeared between the crowd at the airport.
I got back onto my bike with her thoughts intact, trying to recollect every little detail of her today. Her nose ring, her long curly hair, her contagious laughter, her hazel eyes, and that small dimple on her left cheek, I remembered everything about her yet I felt incomplete. It was a feeling which...
"She appeared from behind, slowly measuring her steps before she took them. The crowd stood agitated in front of her house while she stood before them, head down. Between her and the crowd stood her father and Ram. The noise grew louder with every dialogue her father and the crowd spoke, ultimately it was her father who had the last say. The villagers returned back to their humble huts but a decision was still not taken. Her father had to approve of Ram which was in no case easy. He belonged to a different region, a different caste, and most importantly even his parents weren't in agreement with him in this. This made the matters more complicated but Sita was determined. She spoke to her fath...
"When the sun is hotter than it actually is,
When the moon is invisible though it is full indeed,
When the wishes are more than the things we achieve,
When the fate is cursed more than it happens to be,
When the smile that touches ain't real to believe,
When the tear that appears stays forever inside,
When the mind wanders into the past for a future
Other than the present it is turning out to be;
It isn't a pleasant place, to be honest, for one to be,
But it is a place where everyone stays, one time or the other,
Before they leave for the other part of their journey
With experience in hand and a dream to believe,
So till then, we will fight tooth and nail our battle
Until we achieve m...
"Someone recently asked me, why do I write so much on separation. To be honest, I was surprised to hear that. I knew I was experimenting with different roles, with differently aged characters but I didn't realise there always was an element of loss, an element of separation in them. I didn't know why, may be I was comfortable with those shades of grey or those were the shades which we often see in our lives. It's never all happy, it's never all sad, it's always a mixture with different proportions at different times. But yes, I do own my share of scars, the ones I wear with great pride. They define me, and I can't deny them that. So they keep popping up while I write, and may be I allow them ...
I couldn't find a way
To look through the wall,
The one I built for long,
The one that guarded me along.
I didn't find the wall safe anymore;
Silence & seclusion, my trusted companions,
I didn't like their company anymore,
It felt today like a dungeon than the castle I had built it to be.
I kept ramming myself into the wall coz I knew I had a battle to fight,
But time again I fell dejected without getting a brick altered;
Though the charge continued with every ounce of my energy left,
But the old wall was in no mood to crumble, it stood there unharmed.
I found my tears at loss, I found despair in vengeance,
In between all this, I found someone with a hammer
Knocking the wall down from o...
Anwar Chacha, one of the most respected persons of Kullu; known for his charming wit and flamboyant poetry. He ran his family business of textiles while reciting poetry as a pass time; a hobby that stayed with him for over three decades now. Despite being a fifty five year old, he never looked anywhere closer to his age. His daily walks and exercises have kept him hail and hearty, thus keeping the youth alive in his eyes. He was Ram's best friend since childhood. It was he who helped Ram and Sita get married, that to against parental wishes. It was a scene of havoc then but Anwar had managed the situation quite well, allowing everyone to adjust and return to normalcy. He stood by Ram's side, ...
"Sita!" He yelled at top of his voice. The voice resonated with doubled intensity from the mountain top upon which he stood. He screamed out her name again but the answer remained the same as before. He walked back dejected, like always. It felt more like a routine that he couldn't escape. Every morning he would walk towards the narrow point and seat himself on the only bench present at the place. Most days, we would find him staring into the clouds, as if he is looking for answers from above. But the last month seemed a little rough on him than before. He wasn't his normal calm self. There were many instances like today where he ran towards the point, only to stop himself by a moment while l...
"It was one of those breezy winter nights of Kullu, the temperature was chiming down with every brow of feather that flew in the sky. The streets remained static even during the peak evening hour. Standing close to the tea stall, a group of travellers waited as their guide and a few other friends settled around for a quick drag before the hectic climb. It wasn't a pleasant time for doing their trek but they were bound by lack of time and a frenzy for adventure. The group must be commended for their share of oneness as no one broke a sweat even after seeing the nature of weather it was turning out to be. They were eager, as was their guide, Gyan. It was his last share of visitors who he had to...
"There always is a girl, there will always be one. School was where I found her, but the only problem which remained was that I kept finding her over and over again. If you didn't follow what I said then try to hear the story that follows a little more closely, because even I didn't get it the very first time.
Crushes, I know we do have quite a number of them. They come, they make you feel good, then they disappear as we find another. It all began with the movies for me, and it never ended like one though. I was a perpetual newcomer in school due to my father's frequent postings, and unlike others I liked it that way. Short and sweet was something that I had always come to terms with but th...
"Aren't we more reasonable today?"
We seek to derive a little more,
We seem to listen a little less,
And in between those half baked rumours
And videos, we find ourselves
More lost, oops, reasonable than ever before.
"Elusive love, the exclusive run to an improbable tale,
Seeking moon, dreaming stars, glossy and upright;
We stitch, we sew, we wish the dream comes true,
We pass through the years, one and then another,
While she remains in a bubble without a wobble,
The one too perfect to find, the one too hard to compromise;
Battered into solitude, hurt into submission,
We finally look around, we find the imperfections seem to rule,
But we made up our mind, remember we did back then,
No matter how imperfectly perfect the next may be for us;
We remain too greedy, or say dreamy to realise that imperfections
Are the only truth, and the elusive love is not elusive any more,
Not in the pl...
"The wedding bells were louder for me than others as she walked away with another while I stood still, stitching my broken heart."
"Don't dramatise the scene so much Ryan. Just tell me what exactly happened then" Tara replied.
"It's a distant memory Tara. I am allowed to dramatise a little to fill the loops which I am unable to remember."
"Okay agreed. But stitching, sewing or for that matter any other tailoring technique, keep it to yourself. Please don't push them into your narrative!" She literally pleaded with both her arms raised while coming back to rest over me as I continued.
"First tell me why do you want to hear this story now?" I was actually puzzled why Tara had taken Priya's ...
It's amusing to see how things spiral so fast and it's equally annoying when we are part of that spiral. It had been three years since Priya and I had broken up, and it took me forever to get over our relationship. Finally when I thought I was clear and had moved on, her engagement news took me by surprise. She was getting married in a month and something within me was just not okay with it. I deep down knew that we made a terrible couple but I couldn't figure out why this sudden pain. It was disheartening, to be honest; I had finally felt it was done but why is this happening to me now, why now. It took me a lot of courage to dial her number and hear it from her directly to only realise how ...
"The storms of your expectations and their deadlines
Hover all around like dark clouds in the deep blue sky;
Striking lightning at will while burning havoc at night,
But I wish you remain steady, you remain tough;
I know the time isn't easy to survive,
So you go tame the time to tick your own clock alive."
H for Hope
"I am the light that keeps you warm
From the pale wintery nights;
I am the breeze that flows around
When the curse of the albatross pins you down;
I am the fortune teller that shows you things
Where no one could guide you along;
I am neither a messiah nor a fake,
I am someone deep down within;
I am your hope, hope of good things to happen
To you and you alone."