|Not Like Everyone. Don't Hesitate In Writing Me A Letter! :)|
Ah this is weird. I don't know why I'm writing this in the first place, but I guess, I gotta get it out, so here it goes.
Hi everyone. I hope you guys are living the life you all have dreamt of. As of me, I've stopped dreaming now. Yes, this is another pessimistic rant of mine, so if you wish to leave, you're free to do it.
If you've stayed, thank you. It's because of you that I'm still feeling somewhat alive. I've been having many emotional turmoils lately, since last month basically. Some really close to me know about it, but the most of you didn't know. You might have assumed, given the late quotes, but yes, I'm addressing the elephant in the room. I've stopped being happy, for the most...
Dear anyone and everyone reading this,
I'll call this year, the Rollercoaster of my life.
It started with me being tensed, about the boards and stuff. It was hard for me to see, and feel how early the exams were coming.
Here's my life in 2017.
In January, I stopped using social media, specially Instagram. And I didn't write anything, till the very end of it, and what I wrote, turned out to be one of the best I've ever written.
In February, I wrote daily, but never posted. I was studying my ass off, just so I score good. And I have no idea where the month went in Practicals and stuff. Those late nights, and coffee were enjoyable though.
In March, Boards came. A thing every st...
It's funny that I'm writing this to you, even though I know, you can't see this. And also, I know you couldn't care less. Like you didn't when you broke my heart. The heart I gave to you with all my courage, to keep it safe, to keep it away from misery. Alas, I didn't know that I walked in the lion's mouth myself.
You took it, and threw it so far away, that it's been hard for me to find, even now. I don't know what I have. A prpxy heart, maybe? It does nothing, you know. It just pumps the blood in my soulless body till the time my name is to be doomed. But didn't you, already? Dooming me ever since we first talked. You had me, fooled in your talks. I give you credit for that.
Dear someone who used to be mine,
I had no idea about what to call you, so I called you this. Even though I question myself, if you were ever mine, but okay.
Firstly, how are you? Well, I hope. I want you to be well. I can't be a prick, wishing for you to suffer the same as I did, and so genuinely, I wish you wellness and health.
Wondering why I'm writing to you, out of the blues? Well, you gave me a visit. No physically, but in my dreams. Yesterday night. I have no idea how, and such a complicated dream it was, but it wide opened the wounds I had bee trying to cover since so long. Not all to failure. I did succeed a number of times.
Yes, I "did". Now, again, I'm vulnerable. With all th...
Not proofreading. More of a rant.
Why don't I want anyone to fall in love with me?
This is something I've been thinking a lot about, and maybe that is why it is going to be like it is.
I've been told that I'm really good as a person, and that the girl I'll love, or love will be, or is, very lucky, respectively. But do I think the same? I used to.
It makes me wonder, actually. If those girls were so lucky, why did they leave me? Wasn't it love? Maybe it was, but they left me because of my flaws. Flaws that I didn't know existed before they left.
I'm clingy. A big one. And that's one. I can piss the shit out of someone just by bugging them all the time. I just need someone to tell me that...
There was a time when I used to love.
When I felt it in my heart,
That love exists.
That feelings, exist.
When I would see people caring,
For each other.
Unconditionally, wanting nothing in return.
There was a time when I used to love.
When the winters used to gaze upon us,
And I would see two people in the same coat.
Sharing the warmth of affection.
When the summers would wreck havoc upon us,
And sweat made our faces weary.
But then, love was more than faces.
There was a time when I used to love.
When the rains would descend upon us,
Under a single umbrella,
Chirped the love birds.
When the dryness would seep upon us,
Weakening the leaves,
But not the love.
Today, I wonder.
I wonder why those people, who were in my circle, chose to leave me. Am I actually that bad, or do I lack something?
Ever since, we're little, we're bound to make friends. Not in my case though. I made more acquaintances, than actual people whom I may call "friends".
I find the term vague. Most people call anyone they just met, a friend of theirs, even though the reality lies far away from that.
I call someone a friend, when I'm quite sure that this person would take a bullet for me. And maybe, that's where I go wrong.
Or maybe I just lack something. Maybe, it's not their fault, but my own. Maybe I'm not a type of person people would like to stick to.
I think it's tim...
To the girl I love,
How are you? Well, I hope. It's Diwali, and I know how much you like it. Last year, at this moment, we were sitting together in the park, looking towards the sky, and enjoying the lights and sounds. But now things have changed, we have changed.
I remember, I'd lay my head down onto your lap, and you'd play with my hair, giving me goosebumps, and whenever it was least expected, we'd share a kiss. You'd lean on to me, or I'd rise up to you. We thought it was the real moment, and we were to be together always. It was the moment, but the latter, proved to be wrong.
You looked really pretty in the dress you wearing. A perfect mixture of elegance and sexiness. I remember,...
It's festive season here in India, and everyone is going home. Home not as in house, though. Home can be a person, or a family. Everyone has a different perspective and perception, but I don't seem to know about mine? What and where is my home?
As I'm writing this, I'm sitting on the roof of my gramps house in Lucknow. I certainly cannot call this place home, 'cause I cannot feel like that here, no offense to anyone here. But this certainly isn't my place.
My main house, in Delhi. Yes, I'm a Delhiite for people who didn't know. My main house used to be my home, but is it now? I'm not sure, to be very honest. I have loving parents, but I don't get to see them for months, and that...
Let's talk. Shall we?
This is how I talk to people now. I've become a loner, and I couldn't be more proud. I don't know why, but people criticize being lonely as if it's a disease. For me, it's not. And it shouldn't be.
I'm not dependent on anyone, and people can't use me for their advantage. I remain secluded, in the background, and that's fine by me. I do work, though. But rarely in the limelight. It's glary for me, and I'm trying to be a dark soul. So it sucks the darkness inside of me. Does that mean I get appreciation? Nope. Do I care? Nope. I like to work, because of my work ethic, and my ethic to complete anything that I start. That's the only thing that makes me do stuff, not the...
I don't know why I'm writing this, but it's a rant, so yeah. Here it goes.
Hi everyone. Been quite long since I wrote, so pardon my grammar, and my thoughts. I'm in a weird situation right now, where I cannot distinguish between what I'm feeling and what I need? Is it normal? I hope it is. At least, I'd be normal in some way, finally.
I thought leaving school would open new gates of opportunities for me, and which it certainly did. I gave my first spoken poetry thingy, started actual content writing, and started doing more creative work, like craft, at which girls who did my project since grade eight would laugh at, but yes, I'm trying and doing it to the best of my abilities.
"Robot school, or human?",
My wife asked.
It had been a tough question,
Since the start.
Ever since automation made its way,
Humans were left far behind.
And so did the choices of school,
To which, teeth I grind.
Which school my son should go to?
A school where I went.
Where teachers threw assignments on us,
And sweat was the only scent.
Or a robot school?
Where he'd be taught things I was never.
And which will help him reach heights,
I would not ever.
Robot schools have robots as teachers,
And hence, he won't be excused.
He'd learn from cooking,
To fixing a bulb fused.
No lies, or cheats,
Would be entertained.
You'll have to learn eventually,
But would that be kn...
I've been heartbroken,
Quite a lot.
People who know me,
Know my life isn't synonymous with sort.
I'm a writer,
I'm to preach love.
But all my life,
Love I got, has been quite rough.
Now I wonder,
If I'm actually to see it?
Or is it just to break me,
Bit by bit?
'Cause the wait gets longer,
And nothing I see.
All my notions about love,
Are turning out to be disbelieves.
But what is it really love?
Or was it just my immaturity?
Or is it,
What they want me to think in fraternity?
I always knew I was different,
Pretty girls didn't excite me.
I wasn't the good looking one,
Hence, ghosts didn't fright me.
I always liked someone different,
Someone out of the...
Mom: How's everything there?
Me: Everything is good. Excluding the food.
Mom: Hahaha, it's just the food that reminds you of me.
Me: Not really. It's actually the midnight kiss you always gave to me, on my forehead, while you thought I was sleeping, but infact, I waited for it to happen to sleep in peace.
Not having that reminds me of you, maa.
When the love was lost,
I found you.
How much you'll mean to me,
I never knew.
The day you talked to me first,
Wasn't a usual one.
Just a few hearts,
And past bruises, some.
We shared our hearts,
Our sadness, and sorrows,
Our ambitions, and goals.
There was something about you,
That I could never pin point.
In all the misery,
With happiness, you were my joint.
Love is what we make of it,
And you made me make a lot.
You actually made me feel,
That I was someone people sought.
Talking to you made my day,
Loving you made me sleep at night.
In the darkness of our worlds,
Our love was my guiding light.
We made it clear in the first meet,
That we weren't mean...
To the girl I love,
Why does God do this to people like us? Two broken souls, trying to mould each other into better humans, yet being equally shattered all over. Why does he do this? Doesn't he want his kids to love?
I won't say you were the best thing that ever happened to me, but you were certainly one of them. Talking to you made my day, and kissing you goodnight, virtually, made me sleep. You were the air I lived on, the water I cherished, the land you sowed the seeds of a better human, in me. I can never ever thank you for the things you did for me. I honestly haven't seen a more strong girl than you, love.
We both knew that we weren't meant to be, and were maybe just rebounds, b...