“ The less you respond to NEGATIVITY, the more peaceful your life become. “
“ The less you respond to YOUR OWN NEGATIVITY, the more peaceful your life becomes.”
I had lost my voice in this crowdy place, but no I was not terrified because I lost my voice, I was terrified because I lost myself in this chimmery world, like a long lost animal who is scared to hunt, like a bird who is scared of that dark night! I searched for the lost me but I guess i was not ready to be found. So I left the hope to find me because I was too terrified to search any further. But still I stayed back to know a little more about how bitter it can be.
I knew I had that shield to run back to whenever I want. But I didn't want to be protected, I wanted to be exposed, exposed to that harsh world with their selfish motives, I wanted to know, I wanted to learn, but day by day it go...
The same sad eyes,
The same disappointed face
This is what they have,
since some time
Trust, nowhere to be found
Concerns are many,
One is part of all
Want to set them free,
To enjoy life for all
No one wants to be an asshole
when looses control in whole
Control demands 'appropriate' attention,
it resolves all
Attention demands mental training, and soon all goes well....
FOR U MAA.......
I should to hug you daily at least once for bringing me to this beautiful world.
I should hug you daily at least once for always praying for my happiness
I should hug you daily at least once for never giving up on me
I should hug you daily for always repetitively asking me to do things that you think can help me in my life
I should hug you daily for tolerating my aggitated behaviour at times
I should hug you daily for forgiving me every time for my bad behaviour with you
But Maa I couldn't...
I felt you are not giving me what I actually need.
I wanted your TIME
I wanted you to be there when I need you....
I wanted you to hold my hand and tell me All...
Truth about Love which came across to me is that no one loves anyone....but just themselves.
The feeling of being in love with someone else is a mere illusion.
The moment we start understanding love in true sense we will realise that we all just love our own selves....
When someone says I love you....the fact is they love someone because that someone do things that they love.....or offers them something that they are seeking for.
So it's all about our own selves. Once you understand yourself clearly and accepts yourself lovingly...
You will feel that love within you...
You will feel the same love coming towards you from all around.
Love Yourself !
Feel like sitting in a peaceful corner and just reading.....
Reading whatever I read during my school and college days.
ReLearning whatever I learnt till few years back.
Everyone says I am intelligent....I also feel.....
Then my mind reminds me my weak decisions and asks "R u Sure ? "
To which I argue saying it was not me who took those decisions...it was taken by my family...
It again argues asking "y u agreed" ?
To which I reply-coz I was uncertain about my own strengths and weakness...
Coz I was uncertain about my own dreams..
Coz I was being obedient .
Then it kindles me saying then it was not them who should be considered responsible for coz it was apparently you.....who chose n...
It's all about our own KARMA......done knowingly or unknowingly
Which shapes our life.
But when things didn't turn up the way we planned....
We BLAIM !
We blaim almost everything
If we want to improve our lives for better...
We needs to improve our KARMA.
Be more attentive towards our own KARMA.
"I didn't do anything to deserve this...then why is this happening to me."
That's how we crib
That's when the time comes to look back and introspect our past actions.
We will find all the answers....
Where every members seeks
Then why its mostly family who hurt us most........
May be coz we EXPECT not ACCEPT
So end up not accepting and reacting in a certain way on a certain situation.
But we shall never give up on our family.....and keep trying to ACCEPT.
"Relearn to Believe in Yourself"
To relearn to believe in yourself, you need to relearn to try....
Take the first step.....
Everything else required will follow....
U have all the needed courage and capability....
Just start anything you feel good doing....
Just start....no matter you are getting anything materialistic in return or not....
U just do it...
Coz you will get what is required....
Don't fear from unknown future
Cease all your self-doubt and fear of failure...
Coz you got to relearn to believe in your capabilities...
You can do whatever you put your mind into.
Just do it !
My patience was being checked hard
Some MORE time-2 made me end up being Rude, Bitter & Sarcastic
Realised soon, I shouldn't be like that irrespective of the reason
Apologised from the core of my heart
But of no use to a stone-hearted person
Finally i freed myself from being an option anymore.
[P.S: Would Appreciate any suggestion to write this feeling in a more poetic way with a perfect heading ]
"Fighting to Focus"
Focus is the Key...
Trying to bring one to something I love to do,
to something I need to do.......hoping it will help me distract.
But this pain that I am feeling deep inside as someone is acting complicated by neither accepting me completely nor is he letting me go away completely.....is distracting me to focus on anything else...
They says meditation helps you focus but why these thoughts of loosing someone I liked are killing me.
Focus is the key which i am struggling to find.
"A small piece from my diary........"
Always on the marks to fulfil all my duties towards my people
But leaves my duty towards me....
It demands little firmness to say no at times.
It demands little self-centeredness....which generally considered as rudeness....which isn't my innate self.
Feels like going away from my people to those who let me be myself for sometime.
Those who push me towards discovering my own self.
Want to be what I was 10 years back.
Want to relive my life.
Want to be with someone whose presence is strengthening for my inner self.
Who love me for all my sacrifices
Who love me for all my care n understanding
Who love me for all my craziness
Who love me for all m...
Whenever that special love knocked on your door, you ignored it every single time.
So you can't even complaint to god for keeping you away from it.
You generated a habit of ignoring all those hearts who initiates a bond with you.....
And follow those who doesn't show much interest.
This tendency is the real not that you don't deserve it....it's just that you don't allow it to happen.
The point is "Is it the need of control or the desire to choose ?"
Whatever be the reason but you need to learn to prioritise.
You need to learn things happens at its own pace.
You need to relearn to work smart n hard both
You need to remember that your life is yours.....can be lead by your own. You are self-suf...
Peace of Mind
Rare thing to be found
But once experienced and understood the way to achieve it.....everything seems to be achievable.
A sense of silence, solitude and depth prevails.....
Why it is there since the time I last felt love.
Realised little late in life that I am living an aimless life since last 10 years.....just spinning my happiness around my loved ones.
Knocked on my door multiple times....
Lack of clarity took all away.
Books are the only friends I like to be in touch now.
Biggest challenge now
Survival threat is giving me an opportunity now to taste it.