my fists clench, I can feel the monster within me awakening.
"GO BACK TO SLEEP!" I scream at the beast, but my willpower does nothing, my anger has overpowered me once more.
How can I allow the words of someone else to effect me so? Why can I not tame the monster within; no good comes of any conversation I am apart of once the vile creature makes his presence known.
He leaves only heartache in his path, once the evil thing returns to his slumber all that is left is regret, sorrow and pity and I am left to clean up his mess.
I have grown and he sleeps for longer stretched now, but I wish I could slay him once and for all.
I know, in the moment, my words and demeanor are not an accura...
Is it really right or wrong?
Can two people have opposing views and neither be superior?
I think sometimes we should look at situations as right and left instead.
Every day I try to make someone's day a little brighter. You never know what may be going on in that woman's life behind the register or the man who accidently bumped your shoulder. You will feel much more gratification letting things that irritate you go and treating others better than they treat you. We have all had those days where our world comes crashing down and we still have to go about our lives and do our jobs, those days would be a little more tolerable with a warm smile or a kind stranger encouraging us to pick ourselves up and know it will get better. I challenge you to say something kind to 3 strangers this week.
They say "if you are lucky you will get one great love in your lifetime."
You are mine,
But am I yours?
I feel a pain so deep for each person who has been effected by this disease, ravaging and stealing lives far too young. Cancer is a demon, forged from the fires of hell. It does not discriminate; rich, poor, strong, weak, blonde, white, black, young, old... we cannot allow this thing to continue the onslaught of so many. We must band together to slay the beast manipulating our very being, changing us into our own murderers.
Warmth turns cold without notice. Your love grows distant and I can feel the valley between us. You lay next to me, but there may as well be miles between out bodies. how can laughs become silence with such haste. Wow are you able to lie there knowing my mind cannot rest until we are well again. It hurts so deep when you steal yourself away from me. My lover, my friend.
I was born of coal, My life crashed down, time and time again. The pressure mounted with each decision I made and every outside influence. I could feel myself changing. I finally got to a place that I enjoyed and began to dig myself out. The dirt and muck became less compact with each thrust toward the surface. My hands were tired but I would not let them stop. I could see the events with each passage of space, the ones I thought were pointless and filled with only pain and sorrow. The light was more visible through the earthy grains. My fingers let out a luminescent glow. Prismatic colors escaped from my very being. I could see it but I didn't understand it. I emerged, no longer coal, now s...
Where did you come from? When did arrive? I know there was a time before you, and yet I cannot recall a single memory that does not present your face.
Pain and suffering filled my every cell for so long. I hid from the world living vicariously through characters in story books. I could not bare to look into my own life and instead created an existence I could be proud of. A year ago I made a choice to be ok with who I am, to stop looking for something better and make my life what I wanted it to be. I found the peace within myself to stop oppressing myself, I gave permission to be happy and to do what was necessary to achieve my dreams, a chance to write my own story .
Once more I walk along the shore
Skipping rocks, believing lore
I watch the waves, imagine a time
A sailor will return as mine
Yet once again the horizon lacks
in bringing the man I love back
Again I glance, a dot appears
Could it be? my eyes well in tears
My waiting is over, I can see now
As he stands in longing on the bow
Our eyes meet his smile wide
He disembarkes, runs to my side
Cherish the time between goodbyes
You never know where the end lies
The swirling of thoughts left unspoken. Our dreams and fears become reality, if only for a few hours. Time slows, almost stops. Every moment so surreal yet real to us. My dreams haunt, bring joy, satisfy yet leave me longing. Falling asleep is a roll of the dice, I never know which dreams my toss will land on.
The notice clenched between my digits. An offer I never dreamt would be reality. The choice became mine, I have never been good at making my mind up. The CEO is allowing me to choose where to call home, anywhere on the globe. I mull it over, so many destinations and I only get one. I do the only thing that seems logical. I rip a piece of paper into small pieces writing a dream on each one. The slivers dance as they fall into the hat. My shaking hand reaches in and feels for my destiny. My fingers clench one and the weight of it feels eternal, my eyes glance down and I smile as the words "Akureyri, Iceland" appear across the surface. A smaller city in a beautiful country with the man I love an...
If I were a box would you love me more?
Would you crave me the way you do that thing?
I have never been so envious of an inanimate object.
It steals you in the night and beckons you through the day.
I want to be longed for the way you long for the time you share with it.
I want to draw you in and entice you.
But for now I lay, alone... lonely.
My mind is new and everything around me is vivid. Every feeling is intense and every adventure more brilliant. I truly see the vastness and magical qualities of nature and believe in myself and what I can do. The world may try, and may succeed, but I will fight against changing my view on the things I experience and see.
That Tall Hoodied Fellow,
Even more, a promise.
A promise to protect.
To put you before myself.
It has always been you.
It will always be you.
With all my love
Embrace the days when everything seems to go wrong. Look for the good, seek out the light! This task is not easy, sometimes seems impossible, but it you look, truly look you will see at least one glimmer. a spark. Sometimes a spark is all you need to set the weeds ablaze.
Our story could be invaluable to someone else. If I help one person through my pain it will all be worth it. I desire to help those around me in any way I can. If I can use my suffering for good it is no longer an evil inside of me. I have seen evil turn into light through people around me. I have been helped and have helped others. I pray my life can be used for good, even if I never see the extend of the results.
The air is filled with the scent of crisp pine. Snow flakes decend in tiny flurries. I am well aware of the weight the axe brings between my gloved hands. My children look like tiny ducks as they follow behind in a disheveled line, pointing at every tree. My handsome partner beside me, his hand gentle, yet firm, on the small of my back. My feet stop. We all see it, tall, full, beautiful. The children dance around it in excitement dreaming of the gifts they might recieved beneath the branches. I hand the axe to my partner. We stand in a huddle as we watch this strong, wonderful man takes swings at the base. CRACK! The tree falls to the ground shooting up a cloud of fallen snow. Our first year...
13 candles danced their light across the room. My parents smiled warmly as I looked down at my cake. 13 candles glowing as they held innocent hopes and dreams. 13 candles representing the magical years I had spent on this earth. Men emerged through the door, sending the flames into a frenzy, waving metal that had caused so many people in my town to disappear. I looked down at my 13 candles fixating on all they represent, my eyes clenched shut as their guns popped. I kept my eyes closed tight until all I could hear were my parents raspy breaths. I clung on to my parents on the cold floor and watched the flames final flicker as my parents grew silent.
Tiny birds on a telephone wire, watching, observing, knowing and holding secrets. Every street has them. A woman with her shades drawn leaving only a little crack visible, she removes her prosthetic leg. She never tells those she meets about her loss, she believes it paints a weakness across her portrait. A teenage girl slides her window open ever so slowly, her eyes dart around the street as she slips out of the open frame. A man pulls into his driveway, opens his dashboard and slides his wedding band back on his left hand, checks his neck and face in the mirror, then makes his way toward his door. The birds know, they see the things we think are kept secret.
The chill of the air covers my skin in tiny bumps. I shiver at the sight of him, his beady eyes piercing my soul. I try to run but my feet move as if stuck in molasses. I use all of my force to propel my body forward. He moves toward me at a normal speed. The invisible goo seems to bend to his will. Tears stream down my face, I continue attempting to will myself away from this madness. I see his hand out, reaching for me, I must not let him touch me, I must not allow the hurt that comes with him to infect my mind and spirit. I had just recovered from his wicked ways. I feel his hand grasp the nape of my neck. I soar backwards as if gravity no longer exists around me. My eyes snap open. It was...
I am standing amongst the embers, the smoke fills my lungs, the plumes of fear and doubt inhale through my rose colored lips. I choke on the anxiety as I try not to let those around me notice my suffering. I must remain strong and carry the ones I care for through the flames surrounding us. No matter what pain and toxicity fills my body I must save them. I must not show my pain.
It was the middle of winter. We were fourteen, innocent. I glanced above our heads, mistletoe. Our friends shot us looks, they knew we had yet to kiss, we hadn't even held hands. My face became hot, my pale skin was burning red. To my surprise I felt a sensation across my hand. Our fingers entangled for the first time. After three months of dating we finally connected. I think of this every time he grasps my hand, even now, more than twelve years later.
No matter what you are going through or have gone through, you are an amazing person. Remember that you can always choose to do right in the future and bring joy to many people. Choose love in every situation and above all know who you are, never stop your journey of self discovery.
Ps welcome to the moon
I can still hear the roar of cheers from the living room while the Super Bowl was playing on the television. My siblings gathered around us as I sat beneath a table in my mother's bright office. He sat in front of me cloaked in his black hoodie, the sleeves bore holes from his fidgeting fingers. His dark hair would tickle his face and he would make slight yet intentional motions of his head to relieve the tingles from his beautiful hair. My siblings teased us. We had been dating five months and our lips had yet to meet, on fact I had never been kissed by anyone. We both blushed, his fingers fidgeting all the more. I could feel it in my stomach, the butterflies were telling me that today was t...
Am I a song?
can I be sung?
can you rhyme me?
I breathe in life
I grasp your heart
like the love of your youth
does it matter what I'm called
are you calling me by name
you can call me what you will
either way I am the same
news, it's usually unexpected
my news was not the type I like
I sat in the cold room
a paper shirt barely covering me
the doctor had me lie back
and checked some more
her face changed
she said words
words I didn't quite want to comprehend
words that no one wants to hear
I'm too young
too young for this
I have children
I have the love of my life
I facially know what I am meant to do
I know my passion
my future is exciting
and it could be taken
I will fight
I owe it to them
I owe it to me
We are not defined by what we do for a living...
But what we do while we are living .
I gasp for air as another wave crashes over me. My arms are tired, my body aches but I struggle to get my head back above the surface. Once more my lungs fill with oxygen, once more the water pushes me down below the life giving air. The fight continues, it never stops. My arms grow stronger. The more I am dragged under the more strength my body builds. I finally emerge through the crashing waves, mighty, powerful, a woman who can do all things, a woman who can make it to shore.